Gob Bluth Quotes
Buster: So, are you going to hit me?
Gob: No, I'm not going to hit you. You're not the brother Marta's cheating on me with.
Buster: Oh, who is?
Gob: How should I know, Buster?
Michael: Gob, there's no need for violence. There never is. I'd like to think that we're all, you know, intelligent, mature ... um ... adults that can settle their differences, whenever they come to light, through words.
Gob: Yeah, well, I let my fists do the talking. Not this one, 'cause obviously, I need it for coin tricks and stuff. But this one, I let it speak for both of them.
Buster: Well, I would never, uh, do this while you were still going out, but, uh ... if you're done with her, I'd sure like a crack at her.
Gob: Right, right ... That sounds great. Go for it, buddy ... But you know that she's kind of used to being with me, right? So ... it would be sort of like going from prime rib to, I don't know, weird brother of prime rib.
Gob: You've only had sex four times!
Michael: Not four times, four women!
Gob: And she kept using this guy's name like, "Hermano."
Michael: Let me tell you something, Gob. We're going to track this Hermano down, ok? And we're going to nail him. Because if anyone's going to go out with that girl, it's going to be one of us.
Gob: Right. Me.
Michael: And I'm ok with that.
Narrator: The family continued to chant "speech, speech, speech" for no one in particular.
(clapping ceases)
Michael: Gee, after all that, I was kinda hoping somebody would make a speech.
Buster: Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech!
Michael: I'll say something.
Gob: Typical.
Did you know that "fratello" means "brother" in Italian? Strange I know that. I took four years of Spanish.
Gob: Great speech last night.
Michael: Really? What did it inspire you to do, kill somebody?
Gob: Getting there. Marta's cheating on me.
Gob: I'm gonna speak very carefully in case she's with you.
Michael: You're right.
Gob: Right about what? She's there? What's going on? Who's with you? If it's Marta, say "nobody."
Michael: Nobody.
Gob: Well, now I don't know what's going on!
Narrator: Meanwhile, Gob was beginning his charity work at a local nursing home.
Gob: I'm going to need a volunteer for my next illusion: The Aztec Tomb.
Woman: A tomb?
Gob: Or box. Box is ... fine.
Reporter: Where's Earl Milford?
Gob: I-I don't know. I put him in a box. I didn't kill him, alright? And don't edit this for your broadcast so it looks like I'm screaming, "I killed Earl Milford!"
(Cut to Fox6 News)
John Beard: Startling confession tonight at 11:00.
Jesse: It allows me to put Michael front and centre, he needs to be the new face of this family. He is the only likeable one in the bunch, no offense.
Michael: None taken.
Gob: I'm sorry. Isn't Michael the least likeable one in the family?
