Gob Bluth Quotes
George, Sr.: Keep your arm up. That's how you get accuracy.
Gob: I thought you said throwing the ball against the garage door by yourself was how you got accuracy.
Gob: Is there a private bathroom nearby?
George, Sr.: You're looking at it. (taps the commode between the bunks)
Gob: No, no, no. I can't use that. I need privacy. Yeah, I've always been that way. I can't go without privacy. I can't pass this key without privacy.
George, Sr.: Well, I could ask the guys to leave, but, uh ... you know, they've been locking the doors lately. I don't know.
Gob: I'm a complete failure.
George, Sr.: Where'd you get that kind of talk?
Gob: From you. You always say that about me.
George, Sr.: Well, maybe you're not entirely to blame. I haven't always been the best kind of father either.
Gob: Dad, you've done a pretty good job of being a father to everybody in here. What have they got that I don't? I mean, you've never even ... thrown a ball around with me.
George, Sr.: Great. Now, you're an athlete.
Gob: You've got nothing to worry about. We're going to be together for a long time.
Marta: We're a family now. I am so happy. I'm going to call the kids.
Gob: (to himself after Marta leaves) I've made a huge mistake.
Gob: Let me ask you something. Is this a business decision, or is it personal? 'Cause if it's business, I'll go away happily. But if it's personal, I'll go away, but I won't be happy.
Michael: It's personal.
Buster: I am so sorry.
Gob: And if I'm going to be staying here...
Lucille: Staying here? What, did that Mexican throw you out?
Gob: She's not "that Mexican", Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. Anyway, it's over.
Lucille: You've got three days.
Gob: Hey... If I can't find a horny immigrant by then, I don't deserve to stay here.
Buster: It's like she gets off by being withholding.
Gob: Look who's got something to say.
Buster: I'm Mom and I want to shoot down everything you say so I can feel good about myself. 'Cause I'm an uptight -- BLEEP -- Buster -- You old horny slut!
Michael: Well, no one's gonna top that.
Buster: Mom dropped me off to spend time with Michael.
Gob: Spend time with Michael or to serve her own menopausal needs?
Michael: She's always got to wedge herself in the middle of us so that she can control everything.
Buster: (chuckles) Yeah. Mom's awesome.
Michael: What's going on? This is exactly where the two of you were when I left this morning. Is nobody going to even try to get a job?
Lindsay: I have a job, Michael. It's called "supporting my husband."
Michael: You certainly haven't been shopping. The only thing I found in the freezer was a dead dove in a bag.
Gob: You didn't eat that, did you? 'Cause I've only got a couple days left to return it.
Michael: Well, I got news for you, Gob. Dad still doesn't trust me to this day. He treats me like a low level employee.
Gob: It's better than being treated like the goofball... the joker... the magician (uncrosses arms dramatically and nothing happens)
*pause*
Michael: I thought you were gonna do, like a trick there, like the fireball or something.
Gob: I should be in charge. I'm the older brother.
Michael: Do you even want to be in charge?
Gob: No ... but I'd like to be asked!
Gob: So what? Lindsay's been staying at the Four Seas for, like, a month- she's probably charging the company.
Michael: Lindsay's been in town for a month?
Gob: I don't think so.
