I am fresh out of sympathy for liars who kidnapped my friends and replaced them with killer robots.

Simmons [to Radcliffe]

Simmons: You're not crazy!
Coulson: I live alone and make my own soap.
Simmons: It's quaint. Hipster, even!

This reality may be upside down, but Fitz is still Fitz. He's a good person.

Simmons [to Daisy]

Daisy: Wait, are you still dead?
Simmons: No, I'm feeling much better.

Student: Are Hydra all Nazis?
Simmons: Every last one of them. And don't you let anyone forget it.

Do you have moments where reality isn't quite right? Like your memories don't fit?

Simmons [to Coulson]

You have dreams. This is all so real. So many computational layers.

I know Talbot was trying to replicate what was done to Steve Rogers, but you'll never be Captain America.

Simmons [to Director Mace]

Simmons [to LMD Radcliffe]: We'll shoot whenever we damn please.
Mack: And this time, no one's going to put you together again.

Simmons: You know how boys can be with their robots!
Daisy: Actually, I really don't.

You can't have it both ways. You can't push us away and then come crawling back half-dead only when you feel like it. It's unfair!

Simmons [to Daisy]

Now you can get back to Lone Rangering, or whatever it is you're doing.

Simmons [to Daisy]

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Quotes

Hill: Then New York was invaded by aliens, and they were beaten back by among others, a giant green monster, a costumed hero from the 40s, and a god.
Ward: I don't think Thor is technically a god
Hill: You haven't been near his arms.

Hill: What does S.H.I.E.L.D. stand for Agent Ward?
Ward: Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division.
Hill: And what does that mean to you?
Ward: That someone really wanted our initials to spell SHIELD.