Archer

Mondays 10:00 PM on FX
Archer
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Lana, am I just now coming out of a coma from when I drowned saving your life eight months ago?

We've been selling cocaine for the CIA so they can buy arms from Iran!? Did we at least free some hostages?!

Baby, what is she saying? Baby? Baby? BABYYYY?

Thank you, George Borewell, for that clunky analogy in defence of totalitarianism.

Calderon: My father fought the rebels, and his father fought the rebels!
Cherlene: So, like a family business.
Archer: That manufactures oppression.

I facetiously beg milady's pardon.

I'm sorry, Lana. I said a woman. Not a stevedore who lost his hand in a stevedoring accident and then got a hand transplant from an actual bear!

When we get home, first thing, we are bingewatching SchoolHouse Rock.

Apache! Helicopter! We should sell those, cause I'm rapper

Cherlene: Who the hell drilled my box?
Archer: So we're just done with phrasing, right, that's not a thing anymore?

We've got the whole Breakfast club in here. I'm Emilio Estevez, Cyril's obviously Anthony Michael Nerd. Mother, you're Paul Gleason, Krieger's the loose cannon Judd Nelson, and Lana, you're...

Ma, they done killed old Rando.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 309 in total

Archer Quotes

Cyril: Archer, do something!
Archer: Who am I, Alan Turing? He was also in X-Men, remember?

Hawley: Awww screw me!
Archer: ...said Ripley to the android Bishop.