Call him right now! He can't come over here. Look around. I have his napkins hanging up everywhere, he'll think I'm Dexter!

Max

Max: He was fake interviewing me with a celery stalk.
Caroline: Cause you're both grown-ups?

Relax, the bed will be done by the end of the day. Cause I've decided to do what cute girls have been doing for centuries. I asked a guy for help.

Caroline

Johnny: You realize my art won't be worth anything until I'm dead?
Max: Why do you think I keep inviting you here to eat week after week?

Peaches: Max, we're using our spa voice today.
Max: Use my spa voice? Okay...I can't afford this!

But the name sucks a big one! Homemade? It sounds like home-schooled. Like we're churning out cupcakes that aren't comfortable around other people.

Max

Caroline: I went to Starbucks and got you a coffee and bear claw
Max: A bear claw, awesome! I'll sit anywhere you want.

This can't be about my drinking. I don't have the money to be a real alcoholic.

Max

I smiled, and bent over backwards giving them service all for a dollar and forty-seven cents? This makes me the lowest paid hooker in New York.

Caroline

I don't think life likes to be grabbed by the balls

Max

2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 6 Quotes

I smiled, and bent over backwards giving them service all for a dollar and forty-seven cents? This makes me the lowest paid hooker in New York.

Caroline

I don't think life likes to be grabbed by the balls

Max