Mondays 10:00 PM on FX
Archer

Malory: Sterling! Len! Either and or both? Where the hell are you? Len?
Barry: Do you know where he is?
Malory: Yes, I'm just screaming his name down the hall to celebrate that fact.

Cheryl: So, Krieger's a doctor.
Cyril: Not the medical kind!
Krieger: Not even the other kind... technically.

Archer: Why do we have so many damn dolls in here?
Pam: For sexual harassment complaints so people can non-verbally indicate where stuff happened on their bodies.
Archer: That takes like one doll.
Pam: Not if there's ever a gang rape. (fingers crossed)

Archer: Can you put it in a person's brain?
Krieger: It'd suffocate.
Archer: Not the rabbit, you idiot - the chip.
Krieger: Oh yes, absolutely.
Archer: Without killing the person?
Krieger: Oh... maybe?

Barry: Don't try anything stupid.
Archer: I don't have to try.... shit, whatever, move.

Just try to think about something else like there's no sink in there.

Gillette

Cheryl: You can't control a person's heart.
Krieger: You can with a little something I like to call a deep cycle marine battery... or LSD.

Ouch, my earballs.

Cheryl

My plan is to crowd source a plan.

Archer

Barry: Yours for the taking, if you are similarly mine for the taking
Lana: "Taking" as in to get this job I have to have sex with you?
Barry: Hey, those are your words. And also mine, yes.

Cheryl: Why don't you go back to Jamaica?
Pam: A) Because I got deported.

Archer: You've been lying to me my entire life. Just for once I want you to tell me the truth.
Malory: Well, people in hell want ice water.

Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 13 in total

Archer Season 2 Episode 2 Quotes

Ouch, my earballs.

Cheryl

Archer: You've been lying to me my entire life. Just for once I want you to tell me the truth.
Malory: Well, people in hell want ice water.

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