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I'm not afraid. I choose not be around rats because they are unpopular. Same goes for centipedes and lakes.


This is Spanish 101. I know how to say hello, tomorrow and that tables are female. That's the only Spanish you taught us.


Real friends help me with things, not vice versa.


I believe that fusing brownies with the Internet is going to create the next Napster for brownies.


Well guess what, handsome hobo. Your gravy train's leaving the station.

Annie [to Jeff]

Hey, when you go out with me, it gets crazy. That's the Winger guarantee.


Chang [about ex-wife]: You make no mistake about this, Winger. I pleasured that woman greatly.
Jeff: Yeah. You look like you would have to. I'm not surprised you said that.

Annie [to Jeff]: You have to get Chang to call off some of this homework. You're the one with the silver tongue.
Pierce: Yeah, go tongue Chang.

Annie: Are you breaking up with the group?
Jeff: If that's what you want. [walks away]
Pierce: I've been divorced seven times. Turns off your cell phones and bury all your money in the backyard.

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