Friends Season 1 Episode 24: "The One Where Rachel Finds Out" Quotes
Rachel! I love you! Deal with me first!
Chandler
Joey: If I wanna get the money, I'm not allowed to conduct any personal experiments, if you know what I mean.
Monica: Joey, we always know what you mean.
Phoebe: (About Ross bringing luggage) How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
Ross: I'm going to China.
Phoebe: Jeez, you say one thing, and...
Monica: You're going to China?
Ross: (Not wanting to get into it) It's for the museum. Someone found a bone. We want the bone. They don't want us to have the bone. I'm going to try to persuade them to give us the bone. It's a whole big bone thing.
Monica: (About Ross's gift) I can't believe he did this.
Chandler: Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love with Carol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
Rachel: What did you just say?
Chandler: (Panicked) Ahem... um... Crystal duck.
Rachel: No, no, no... the, um, the... "love" part?
Chandler: (Stuttering incoherently) F-hah... flennin...
Rachel: Oh... my God.
Chandler: (Rubbing his temples) Oh, no-no-no-no-no...
Joey: That's good, just keep rubbing your head. That'll turn back time.
Joey: (About participating in a fertility study) Alright, come on you guys, it's not that big a deal. Really... I mean, I just go down there every other day and... make my contribution to the project. Hey, hey, but at the end of two weeks, I get seven hundred dollars.
Ross: Hey.
Phoebe: Wow, you're gonna be making money hand over fist.
Melanie: (Talking about Joey) There is a little child inside this man.
Chandler: Yes, the doctor said if they remove it, he'll die.
Ross: I'm going to China.
Joey: The country?
Ross: No, the big pile of dishes in my mom's breakroom.
Joey: It's like I'm able to appreciate it on another level!
Chandler: I didn't know you had another level.
What? You think I'm gonna tell a girl I like that, I'm also seeing a cup?
Joey
Joey: Move on. Go to China. Eat Chinese food.
Chandler: Of course there, they just call it food.
Joey: (To Ross) We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man.
Chandler: I'm still on my first. I... I just think you're nice.
Monica: (About Ross's feelings for Rachel) Did you have any idea?
Rachel: No! None! I mean, my first night in the city, he mentioned something about asking me out, but nothing ever happened, so I just... (To Joey) Well, what else did he say? I mean, does he, like, want to go out with me?
Joey: Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something.
