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Mr. Shue, when I met you I was just an annoying Jewish girl with two gay dads and a very big dream. Today, I still have two dads, and I'm still Jewish, and I'm probably just as annoying.


There's a lot of teachers at this school who teacher their students important things like how to drive and fractions, but you teacher your students how to dream.


Lindsay Lohan: I show up here and there's not even a red button to push and a chair to spin me around where I can then point at a kid on stage and yell 'I wanna work with you!' Really? I'm firing my manager.
Perez Hilton: Can I use that as an exclusive?

I'm here, Perez, because I care about young artists chasing their impossible dreams. I know them. I feel them. I was them. So I'm here to support them unconditionally.

Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay: Whoa whoa whoa. Oh my god. Seriously? Did you just blog about me during that last performance?
Perez: You're welcome. It's already got over 3 million hits.

This is your moment. Okay? Three years in the making. Forget about everything else. Take it.


Sue: Dick Butkis, I beg of you, chew your cud with your mouth closed.
Beiste: Sorry. I'm as nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

I have so many steroids running through my body right now I may turn into the Incredible Hulk if you piss me off.


Carmen Tibideaux is coming and we're gonna be perfect. And then we're gonna get married and I'm gonna smash this glass and then we're gonna live happily ever after.

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