I was an investment banker Max. That's like one step below tonight show bandleader.

Brad

Old Dave and Alex never made any effort to be romantic at all. You and I just tried so hard we shut down O'Hare for two hours.

Dave

You think a Bar Mitzvah gets hyped in this town without me knowing about it?

Max [to Brad]

You saw him cramp up during the Horah and he was nowhere to be found when "Shout" came on. No one could get even the slightest bit louder and at no point could anyone get even at all softer.

Penny

Dave: All that's in here his travel Guess Who and a terrifying amount of condoms.
Alex: They're for your penis.

Look at that man move. This is some good material for the buzz-bank.

Jane

I don't get it. What is it about me? I am like Jewish boy crack.

Penny

You know I always thought I'd marry a Jewish guy, until I met this chocolate anaconda.

Jane

Max leads a league in having jobs you didn't know were jobs.

Brad

Jane: So Max is a Bar Mitzvah MC now...
Penny: I think they prefer to be called Bart Mitzvah hype guys.

Displaying all 10 quotes

Happy Endings Season 3 Episode 3 Quotes

Max leads a league in having jobs you didn't know were jobs.

Brad

Jane: So Max is a Bar Mitzvah MC now...
Penny: I think they prefer to be called Bart Mitzvah hype guys.

x Close Ad