Max: Hello this is not a foursome, you guys are totally fifth wheeling me!
Dave: C'mon man we're not fifth wheeling you, Joey Fatone.
Brad: Yeah you're still part of the group Sporty Spice.
Jane: You're our favorite character Roz from Frasier.

I'm always write about cornplay, I was wrong about Coldplay though, they're still huge.


Jane: Penny's happy so as her friend you should-
Max: - Probably be trying to break her and Pete up? Yeah I just don't know if that seems like me.

Alex: Always start with your high end meats, skip veggies they'll only fill you up with nonsense.
Mrs. Kerkovich: And?
Alex: Be sure to make sexual eye contact with the carver, your stomach will thank you.

I'm seeing you in a whole new light too. The kind of light they use when you try on a bathing suit. Which is a very unflattering light sir. Not good!

Jane [to Brad]

Spin class or chemistry class? It's like Breaking Bad in here, sit down let's cook!


Pete I'm pregnant! I'm not but I could be! we could sell it and live off the money.


Why the long face Michael Phelps?


She's like Crazy Stupid Love crazy, not like people who loved Crazy Stupid Love crazy, I mean she's not a psycho.

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