Dennah: Two years ago I went as a slutty nurse, and then last year I was a slutty judge, but this year I'm just gonna cut out the middle man and go as a slut.
Annie: We get it, you hate your parents.

• Permalink: We get it, you hate your parents.
• Added: October 28, 2014

I'm engaged now. I gotta be fiancé-Jake. I gotta use French words like champagne and fiancé-Jake.

Jake

• Permalink: I'm engaged now. I gotta be fiancé-Jake. I gotta use French words like champagne and...
• Added: October 21, 2014

Jake: What if I just ask her what's wrong, and then when she tells me "I'm fine", I don't accept it and I push through to what's really bothering her?
Gil: What kind of mutton-head moron would push through an "I'm fine"? The "I'm fine" is your best friend, pal.

• Permalink: What kind of mutton-head moron would push through an "I'm fine"? The "I'm fine" is your best...
• Added: October 21, 2014

Only children are monsters.

Kay

• Permalink: Only children are monsters.
• Added: October 21, 2014

Okay what's wrong? You're doing that thing that you do when you're uncomfortable and you ramble on and on about random subjects. Sounds like bad 90's stand-up.

Jake

• Permalink: Okay what's wrong? You're doing that thing that you do when you're uncomfortable and you...
• Added: October 21, 2014

Annie: I don't want him to think I'm a crazy person.
Kevin: Oh sweetie, you passed that exit miles ago.

• Permalink: Oh sweetie, you passed that exit miles ago.
• Added: October 21, 2014

It's a dating app for lesbians, like Grinder is for gay men, or Tinder is for straight men and whores.

Kay

• Permalink: It's a dating app for lesbians, like Grinder is for gay men, or Tinder is for straight men...
• Added: October 21, 2014

Without you I would just spin off into space like Sandra Bullock in "Gravity". You keep me grounded, like Sandra Bullock in real life.

Annie

• Permalink: Without you I would just spin off into space like Sandra Bullock in "Gravity". You keep me...
• Added: October 14, 2014