Parks and Recreation

Thursdays 8:30 PM on NBC
Parks and recreation
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if I'm not mistaken that was the old lady version of flashing. Nailed the gig.

Andy

Old Woman #1: I told you so. It's Duke Silver.
Old Woman #2: Duke, can I have your autograph? I love your music.
Ron: You're mistaken, ladies. Move along.

God, why does everything we do have to be cloaked in like 15 layers of irony?

April

Well, it's been an interesting ride. I got a job at a grocery store, right out of college. Just for a way to make money. Here I am, 40 years later, completely unemployed.

Frank

Wendy: You're suing me for alimony?
Tom: Yes. When we were married I got accustomed to a certain lifestyle and I'm entitled to money to maintain that lifestyle.

My problem is I don't know how to tell if we're doing good, because when you play a rock show, it's really easy to know if you're doing great because chicks will flash their boobs at you. When you're up on stage. And you're like, "That musta sounded pretty good." But I can't, if that happens here my eyes will fall out of my head and I'll die.

Andy

Andy: Uh, I mean that sucked. Didn't it?
Bandmate: Maybe if you sang it like Louie Armstrong?
Andy: Maybe, yeah. I mean here's the thing though: Who is that?

Derek: Because old people are funny.
Ben: Yeah, it'll be like the Golden Girls.

Or, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. Oh, Jen. I really want you to be happy. Stay away from John Mayer!

Leslie

Justin: Pick you up tomorrow around noon.
Leslie: For our nooner, which is a cute word!
Ron: Explain it to her later.
Leslie: Explain what?

Andy: I just wrote a new song, OK? Bottom line: it's called "sex hair." It's about how you can tell when someone just had sex 'cause of how their hair gets matted up in the back. It's awesome.

But think about how much better our friendship would be, if we added, doing it.

Tom [to Wendy]
Displaying quotes 1 - 12 of 17 in total

Parks and Recreation Season 2 Episode 16 Quotes

It's the most romantic story ever. It makes The Notebook look like Saw V.

Leslie

If you look inside your bags you will find a few things. A bouquet of hand crocheted flower pens, a mosaic portrait of each of you made from the crushed bottles of your favorite diet soda and a personalized 5,000-word essay of why you are all so awesome.

Leslie
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