Parks and Recreation

Parks and Recreation "Pilot" Quotes

Leslie Knope: When I go through these doors, I need to be "on", like the White House Press Secretary. Are you ready?
Tom Haverford: Yes.
Leslie Knope: OK! Here we go! (pulls on the door, looks into the camera) It's locked.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie Knope: Sir? This is a childrens slide. You're not allowed to sleep here.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie Knope: These people are members of the community that care about where they live. So what hear when I'm being yelled at is people caring ... loudly at me.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie Knope: Well, if you want something done in this town, you call Mark Brendanawicz because he's a city planner, but he's more than that. He's kind of a fixer. He fixes things. He's a smart, capable guy. He just .... he knows where the bodies are buried.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie Knope: So this was built in 1935. It's called Pioneer Hall. And a little trivia: it is one of the first structures in America to ever have locks.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Ron Swanson: This is my basketball court. I don't want to see any double dribbles. I don't want to see any three second violations.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Leslie Knope: This is where the rubber of government meets the road of actual human beings.
 • Rating: 4.0 / 5.0

Leslie Knope: Dream with me for a second, Ann: doesn't this neighborhood deserve a first class park? Imagine a shiny new playground with a jungle gym; and swings; pool; tennis courts; volleyball courts; raquetball courts; basketball courts; regulation football field; we can put an ampitheater with 'Shakespeare in the Park'...
Ann Perkins: It's really not that big of a pit.
Leslie Knope: We can do some of those things.
 • Rating: Unrated

Leslie Knope: (singing while drunk) Soul Sister, Soul Sister, better get that dough sister! Sweet Lady Marmalarde.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Tom Haverford: Every now and then, we have these little gatherings, and Leslie gets plastered. One time, I convinced her to try to fax someone a Fruit Roll Up. She, one time, made out with the water delivery guy. In her office. On Halloween, she was dressed up as Batman. Not Batgirl; Batman. And I convinced her to go stop a crime that was going on outside. And it is my favorite thing in the world.
 • Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

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