Elaine: Can you keep a secret, Clark?
Clark: That's my job.
Elaine: I'm going to run for president again, and this time I'm gonna win.

I stayed because I loved him.


Susan: Let's be clear: I am definitely more upset that you stuck your dick in another woman than I am about the story.

Someday, it would be nice to work for the man that beat me.


There has to be a rule about discussing my mother when I'm inside you.


You were the foxiest piece of ass that I ever laid my eyes on. You still are.

President Hammond

How am I going to do anything important if no one helps me?


Occupational hazard, right. It comes with being a Hammond. They love us when they're not busy hating us.


Oh, and Bud, I want a divorce.

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