In this moment I can't imagine where that magic dust is coming from.


Anthony: Bert, is this 70's inspired?
Bert: What am I the history buff all of a sudden?

Laura: Did you get your Halston job there?
Bert: No, I got it in the balcony, third row.

I just want you to know that she gets bristly about your taste level.


OK, we've got four to five and a half hours to get two days work done, folks. Let's get cracking.


They look like I'm making pants for a 500 lbs. woman.


You've got real schizophrenia between the two outfits.

Michael Kors

Tim: I just think it draws your eye to the crotch.
Josh: Yeah.

If Bert comes up with a dopey look, that's his problem.


Bert can't remember where he put his toothpaste half the time.


Just take back what you're going to say.


The fact that Bert lived through this whole era is a bonus.