You just can't stand for anybody to have their own opinions about anything, can ya? You tell them how stupid they are all the time, and you get them to question what they believe in their hearts is the right thing to do until they make some enormous mistake that tears America apart, and brings the world to the bring of a nuclear apocalypse.

Jackie

Jackie: You kept saying what a disaster it would be if she got elected, and how I wasn't seeing the big picture. And how everything was rigged, and I got into the booth and I voted for Jill Stein.
Roseanne: Who's Jill Stein?
Jackie: Some doctor.

Jackie, it is not my fault that I happen to be a charismatic person who's always right about everything.

Roseanne

Roseanne: I forgive you.
Jackie: I know how hard that was for you!

Roseanne Season 10 Episode 1 Quotes

Dan: Candyman's home babe.
Roseanne: Oh, my favorite, drugs! What happened to the rest of our candy?
Dan: Funny story. Our insurance don't cover what it use to so I got the drugs for twice the price.

Roseanne: Dan! Dan!
Dan: What? What happened?
Roseanne: I thought you were dead!
Dan: I'm sleeping! Why does everybody always think I'm dead?
Roseanne: You looked happy. I thought maybe you moved on.