Lydia: Like listen to me when I talked, or go to any of Nate's little league games, or the fact that this was the Christmas that you told Nate that Santa was an anti-Semite and proceeded to re-enact the Holocaust.
Harrison: Okay, I'll admit my Holocostume was a mistake.

• Permalink: Okay, I'll admit my Holocostume was a mistake.
• Added: September 29, 2015

Dad, take that off. You look like an albino Tom Selleck.

Nate

• Permalink: Dad, take that off. You look like an albino Tom Selleck.
• Added: September 28, 2015

Don't be nice to me while you're doing something stupid.

Nate

• Permalink: Don't be nice to me while you're doing something stupid.
• Added: September 28, 2015

Lydia: I'm not having a midlife crisis.
Parker: Somebody should tell your shorts that.

• Permalink: Somebody should tell your shorts that.
• Added: September 28, 2015

Mom, a condo is where old people go to die.

Nate

• Permalink: Mom, a condo is where old people go to die.
• Added: September 28, 2015

Lydia: He's snaking my disposal.
Nate: Oh, is that what the kids are calling it now.

• Permalink: Oh, is that what the kids are calling it now.
• Added: September 28, 2015