Wolowitz: Do you like role playing games?
Bernadette: Like in the bedroom or dungeons and dragons?
Wolowitz: Either?
Bernadette: No

Sheldon: I came here to defeat Wil Wheaton: the man who destroyed my dreams, but I can't destroy Wil Wheaton: the man who loved his mee-maw

Wolowitz: Listen, you have to come to Shabbas dinner at my house sometime.
Bernadette: Why?
Wolowitz: A Catholic girl like you, wearing big cross like that, might just give my mother that big brain aneurysm I've been hoping for.
Bernadette: Only if you come to Sunday dinner at my house wearing a yamaka
Wolowitz: It's a date

Bernadette: Does your mother call you every day at work to see if you've had a healthy lunch?
Wolowitz: My mother calls me every day to see if I've had a healthy bowel movement

Wil [about Sheldon]: Did that guy just say, "revenge is a dish best served cold" in Klingon?
Stuart: I believe so
Wil: What is wrong with him?
Stuart: Everyone has a different theory

Sorry boys, say "hi" to your mother when she comes to pick you up... or I could just tell her later tonight!

Raj

It might also interest you to know that Wil Wheaton currently ranks sixth on my all-time enemies list, right between director Joel Schumacher, who nearly destroyed the Batman movie franchise, and Billy Sparks, who lived down the street from me and put dog poop on the handles of my bicycle

Sheldon

Leonard: You know deep down on the inside, Howard's a good guy
Penny: The problem isn't what's on the inside, it's the creepy candy coating

The Big Bang Theory Season 3 Episode 5 Quotes

It might also interest you to know that Wil Wheaton currently ranks sixth on my all-time enemies list, right between director Joel Schumacher, who nearly destroyed the Batman movie franchise, and Billy Sparks, who lived down the street from me and put dog poop on the handles of my bicycle

Sheldon

Leonard: You know deep down on the inside, Howard's a good guy
Penny: The problem isn't what's on the inside, it's the creepy candy coating