Every year, my sweet, sweet grandmother sends me a check on my birthday for fifty dollars. And lately, she has been sending me, like nine or ten checks a year... uh, as Nana starts to... but, I knew I should be saving it for something, I just didn't know what I should be saving it for. And then I had an awakening. "Michael, buy a motorcycle." So I put the money in my shoe, and then I forgot about it until now.

Michael

Toby: Good morning, Kelly.
Kelly: I can't believe this is your last day. How do you feel?
Toby: Fine. Good.
Kelly: I feel weird.

Toby: Morning.
Michael: Mornin'. [to camera] So here we go, just a matter of hours now, until his horribleness has left the building. I'm going to set my watch alarm... And... [watch beeps]

Andy: Angela, will you do me the honor of giving me your tiny hand in marriage?
Angela: ... Okay.
Andy: Into the mic, sweetie.
Angela: I said, okay.
Andy: She said yes! And the crowd goes wild! Woo!

Well, this is what happened. Uh, Ryan's big project was the website. Which wasn't doing so well. So Ryan, to give the impression of sales, recorded them twice. Once as offices and once in the website sales, which is what we refer to in the business as misleading the shareholders. Another good term is fraud. The real crime, I think, was the beard.

Oscar

Holly: [thinking Kevin is slow] Hi!
Kevin: Hi.
Holly: What do you do?
Kevin: I do the numbers.
Holly: Oh, good for you!
Kevin: You want an M&M?
Holly: Oh, no, that is so sweet. Thank you, though.
Kevin: I keep them here at my desk so that everybody doesn't take them.
Holly: Well, that is a very safe place for them.
Kevin: [smiling] Yeah.

Hazing is a fun way to show a new employee that she is not welcome or liked.

Dwight

Dwight: So what do we know about her?
Michael: Well, we know that Toby thinks she'll be great. So strike one, I hate her already.
Dwight: I hate her, too.
Michael: Why do you hate her?
Dwight: Because she... stinks. With her... ways. And her... head.
Michael: You know Dwight, sometimes... I dunno, I think you say things just to agree with me.
Dwight: Would that be such a bad thing?
Michael: Yeah, it would! Just have a thought! Have an original thought! Although I will agree that her head is weird.

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