The Office

Typically when shows tease "web exclusive" content, it's quite forgettable. This recent effort created by four members of the cast of The Office, however, is anything but.

Viewers who watched Thursday's episode, "Koi Pond," caught a brief glimpse of an aspiring girl pop duo, Subtle Sexuality, promoting its debut single, "Male Prima Donna."

A series of three shorts were posted by NBC, showing the making of the video by Kelly Kapoor (Mindy Kaling) and Erin the receptionist (Ellie Kemper), plus the final edit.

"Male Prima Donna" is named for Mr. Understood, a.k.a. Ryan Howard (B.J. Novak), who also appears in the video, as does 'Nard Dog, a.k.a. Andy Bernard (Ed Helms).

Filmed at Dunder-Mifflin Scranton on a shoestring budget, featuring Kanye West-style vocoders and epic dance moves, it could actually pass for a Britney Spears song.

Or at least Heidi Montag. Check out Subtle Sexuality's debut video below ...

Thursday's episode of The Office was called "Koi Pond." This is because Michael took a spill into one on his way to a business meeting and Jim let him flounder. Har har, get it?

A Halloween episode that began uncomfortably (see photo) with a party for local kids at the Dunder Mifflin warehouse became more so after Michael's aforementioned spill.

Michael simply could not handle being the butt of a joke and bad fish puns.

Some of them were pretty good, too. The longer it went, the harder he took it. Then, in an effort to roll with it, he only made himself look more insecure and awkward.

In short, vintage Office.

Halloween. Michael Scott style. Relax ... it was even worse than it looks.

Some of The Office quotes from this episode were even more classic than usual. Follow the link for our complete list from 2005-present. Some of last night's best:

Creed: I vant to sell you blood!
Ryan: That's really not the trend in vampires right now. | permalink

Darryl: You're not as scary as Bookface over there.
Jim: Yes. I am the popular social networking site known as Bookface. | permalink

Michael: I'm not usually the butt of the joke. I'm usually the face of the joke. I wish Jim had fallen into that pond. Then he'd have to put on my suit. And it'd be too short. And he'd look... dammit he'd still look good. | permalink

Pam: You blew the sale, you idiot!
Andy: Let me tell you something, I was never gonna make that sale. | permalink

Erin: Uh, David Wallace called.
Michael: Oh he did, what did he say?
Erin: He heard you made a big splash, at the meeting, oh my God that was so mean what I just said and I didn't mean it. It was Kevin and Meredith that put me up to it.
Kevin: I'm gonna kill you. | permalink

Stanley: Michael don't listen to them.
Michael: Thank you Stanley.
Stanley: You just ignore their carping.
Michael: Okay.
Dwight: Michael.
Michael: Yes.
Dwight: A carp is both a fish and a term for complaining. They're mocking you with wordplay. | permalink

Dwight: Jim is my enemy. But it turns out that Jim is also his own worst enemy. And the enemy of my enemy is my friend. So Jim, is actually my friend. But, because he is his own worst enemy, the enemy of my friend is my enemy so actually Jim is my enemy. But- | permalink

Thursday's episode of The Office, "The Lover," showed us a sign of Pamela Morgan Beesly we had never seen before. Funny what Michael Scott doing your mom will result in.

That's right, after hitting it off in Niagara Falls, Michael and Pam's mom Helene are dating, and when Pam learns about this, she is absolutely livid. Even Jim is at a total loss.

By and large, the episode revolved around Pam and Michael fighting about this singular issue, but it sure was entertaining. The subplot of the night was Dwight spying on Jim.

Jealous of Jim's promotion, Dwight planted a listening device inside a wooden duck mallard he presented Jim as a gift. His efforts quickly and hilariously unraveled, obviously.

Pam's first and last smile of the episode came in the first five seconds.

As always, The Office quotes from the episode produced numerous memorable lines that ranged from subtle to passive-aggressive to hysterical. Some of our favorites:

Pam: I'm not apologizing to anyone. Michael owes ME an apology.
Michael: For trying to find happiness in the arms of a lover?
Pam: Don't call my mother your lover!
Kevin: Yes! That's what I'm talking about.
Andy: That is not okay dude.
Michael: Okay, in my defense...
Phyllis: Disgusting.
Creed: That's messed up man. | permalink

Michael: I assumed that you want me to be happy, because I want you to be happy.
Pam: Michael. Let me make this very easy for you. I COULD GIVE A SH!T ABOUT YOUR HAPPINESS. STOP DATING MY MOTHER!
Michael: You know what, I'm gonna start dating her even harder.
Pam: What's that supposed to mean.
Michael: You know what it means. | permalink

Jim: Oh, so Dwight gave me this wooden mallard as a gift. I found a recording device in it. Yes. So. I think if I play it just right, I can get Dwight to live out the plot of National Treasure.
Pam: You need to be more upset about this. She's your mother too now. Your mother is sleeping with Michael Scott. | permalink

Dwight: [to Michael] You know, I really would've appreciated a heads up that you were into dating mothers. I would've introduced you to mine. | permalink

Michael: [to Pam] You're just as stubborn as your mom - when you don't want to do something, you just don't do it. | permalink

Dwight: Volunteerism is important. Every weekend I volunteer at the local animal shelter, they need a lot of help down there. Last Sunday I had to put down 150 pets by myself. | permalink

Michael: I don't need to be friends with Pam. I have plenty of female friends. My mom. Pam's mom. My aunt... although she just blocked me on IM. What's her face, from Quizno's? I see her like four times a week. | permalink

Last week's hour-long wedding episode of The Office was an entire series in the making. The subsequent episode, which aired Thursday night, was a bit of a letdown.

At the same time, it was good to see the Dunder-Mifflin gang back in their usual setting, and without Jim to keep Michael in check, he was off his rocker last night.

Convinced that an insurance salesman was a mafioso, Michael, Dwight and Andy set out to intimidate him right back. Meanwhile, Kevin started using Jim's office.

The man's got to pass gas and steal identities somewhere.

Follow the link for a detailed recap of "Mafia."

As always, there were a number of hilarious The Office quotes from the episode, sub-par as it may have been. A bad Office episode is better than a good ... almost anything!

Michael: Ok too many different words from coming at me from too many different sentences. | permalink

Operator: Well Mr. Halpert, you're obviously not in San Juan Puerto Rico.
Kevin: Wait a minute, yes I am--
Operator: We're going to go ahead and put a hold on your card.
Kevin: No- that- I think that we should let the criminal use the card a little longer. | permalink

Kevin: I wouldn't last in jail, Oscar, I'm not like you.
Oscar: What's that supposed to mean?
Kevin: Oh you don't know about jail? Oh you would LOVE jail.
Oscar: Why would I love jail.
Kevin: Because [pauses] you would love it. | permalink

Michael: There is nothing more insulting to a great salesman than having to listen to a bad salesman. It's like a great basketball player having to listen to a bad basketball player. | permalink

Dwight: The only way to stop a bully is to stand up to him. Trust me - I've bullied a lot of people. | permalink

Dwight: 'R' is among the most menacing of sounds. That's why they call it murder and not mukduk. | permalink

Michael: Erin. Coffee.
Erin: Ok.
Michael: Not from the kitchen. Stop & Shop. If it's not Stop & Shop I send it back. Large. If it's a medium I send it back. If it's an extra-large I send it back.
Erin: How do you return coffee?
Michael: Go. | permalink

Dwight: Do you know how to use that?
Andy: To change tires? No. But it's metal. I can hit somebody with it. | permalink

This week's hour-long episode of The Office was five years in the making.

Indeed, Jim and Pam got married at Niagara Falls, during a wedding weekend that involved:

• An injured scrotum;
• Tissue boxes for shoes;
• Michael likely sleeping with Pam's mom;
• And a romantic, isolated ceremony under a waterfall.

Read through a detailed recap of "Niagara" and let us know if it lived up to your expectations.

As always, there were a number of hilarious The Office quotes this week. We've listed a bunch below:

Pam: I know way too much about Andy's scrotum. | permalink

Dwight: I'm ravenous after a night of love making. | permalink

Michael: They're men, Dwight.
Dwight: I love finding a good set of twins. | permalink

Michael: You can't expect them to be careful everytime because it's a different sensation.
| permalink

Dwight: In 1996, her volleyball team went 10-2.
Michael: What am I supposed to do with that?
Dwight: That's a very good record. | permalink

You've seen photos from The Office wedding episode.

You've read a feature article about the wildly anticipated hour of comedy.

But what about watching a couple scenes from the day Jim and Pam finally tie the knot? We had a feeling that would pique the interest of readers.

Below, Michael sends Jim and Pam off to Niagra Falls in a way only he can: by decorating his own car and growing emotional over his own "very important day." Watch and laugh:

Wedding Episode Clips

Also, follow this article's jump to see how Pam messes up the couple's first mental photos from the event.

Continue Reading...

While Pam tries to encourage people to just give her and her fiance cash instead of buying something off the wedding registry, groom-to-be Jim has bigger fish to fry.

Namely, how the heck he's going to handle his new joint management position with the perpetual pain in the a$$ that is Michael Scott ... and staving off a coup.

Needless to say, a vengeful, jealous and raging lunatic Dwight was at the center of said coup attempt. Check out our recap of "The Promotion" if you missed it.

Check out our complete collection of The Office quotes from this and every episode in the show's six season history. Some of the best lines from "The Promotion" ...

Dwight: I deserved that promotion, not Jim. It makes me want to put him in a triangle chokehold, and force him down to the ground and just keep pressing and pressing and then flip him over and put him in a hammerlock! And he's gasping! He's panicking. Every last breath! And the crowd is going crazy. And boom! I emerge victorious! Ah-ha! Eighteen thousand dollars and a chance at the title! Whewhaa! | permalink

Kelly: I love rivalries. Michael or Jim. Paris or Nicole. Heidi or LC. It's so much fun. But, I guess if I'm really thinking about it and answering your question honestly, I'd have to go with LC. Heidi's a bad friend. And her skin, is terrible. | permalink

Creed: Hey, why haven't we ever, uh...
Meredith: We have. | permalink

Michael: You know what eats a large amount of the day? Naps. You go to sleep it's light out, you wake up it's dark. That's the whole day. Where did that day go? I have no idea.
Jim: You mean on a weekend.
Michael: [pause] Yes. | permalink

Jim: I've been studying Michael for years and I've condensed what I've learned into this chart. [holds up pie chart] "How Michael Spends His Time." You can see we have "procrastinating," and "distracting others," and this tiny sliver here, is "critical thinking." I made it bigger. So that you could see it. | permalink

On this week's episode of The Office, Pam tried her best to figure out who was coming to her and Jim's wedding.

Consider this a spoiler, but we can confirm that the entire gang makes it to Niagra Falls for the October 8 episode titled "Niagra."

During this one-hour special, Jim will screw up his rehearsal dinner toast; Kevin and Oscar will be mistaken for a couple; Andy will go after Erin; and, oh yeah, the ceremony viewers have waited five years for will take place!

Be warned: The Office quotes that week may be as sentimental as they are funny. We can't wait.

Click on the photos below for an early look at scenes from the episode, highlighted by a certain, once-in-a-lifetime kiss:

When Jim tries to keep Michael in the dark and secure a promotion, you know it won't end well. After all, Michael doesn't want to lose Jim ... or Pam. Or the baby.

Meanwhile, Dwight and Toby are totally convinced Darryl is lying about a worker's compensation claim. When they go to investigate this theory, hilarity ensues.

Did Jim get the job? Was Darryl lying? Who's in and who's out for the Jim-Pam wedding? What new ways did Michael Scott to sabotage pretty much everything?

Check out our recap of "The Meeting" and find out.

Check out our complete collection of The Office quotes from this and every episode in all six seasons. Some of the best lines from "The Meeting" included:

Darryl: Toby! Dwight! You come to my house? Bust up my trash cans? Call my baby sister an a$$hole and tell her to eat dog food?
Dwight: We thought she was you.
Darryl: How would you think a lady is me?
Dwight: [pause] Are you serious? Because you look exactly alike? Am I the only one who ...
Toby: I don't see it. | permalink

Jim: I didn't tell Michael because I thought he'd try to help. Example: He handed out jello shots at the 23rd mile of the Steamtown Marathon. | permalink

Michael: Wallace just HAD to show up. On the one four-month period where I'm completely overwhelmed. | permalink

Pam: We invited everyone in the office to our wedding, even though we knew most people probably couldn't make the drive to Niagara Falls. Which is why we're having it in Niagara Falls. | permalink

Dwight: He's lying.
Toby: He has a doctor's note.
Dwight: Yeah, from who, Dr. J? You really need to investigate this. People don't just fall off ladders.
Toby: A guy on my street fell off a ladder. It was on the news? | permalink

Michael: Corporate shut down the Buffalo branch, which left us to absorb all of their clients. I will tell you, there has been ... work, every day. I had to come in on a Saturday... to retrieve ... I left my cell phone here. | permalink

On October 8, The Office quotes will go from hilarious to sentimental. Sort of.

On that date, the NBC sitcom airs a one-hour episode that focuses on an event years in the making: Jim and Pam's wedding.

In the latest issue of Entertainment Weekly, various cast members speak on the occasion, which will be set at Niagra Falls.

“It’s about keeping this relationship as real as we can instead of making it a television romance,” said John Krasinski (Jim). “When you have two characters who are so perfect for each other, it’s a little weird for them to not get married.  So you have to put that step in, whether it’s been done on television successfully before or not.”

This is The Office, of course. Not everything will go smoothly during the wedding weekend.

Said Paul Lieberstein (a wrier on the show, and the actor that portrays the underrated Toby), referring to a rehearsal dinner mistake:  "Jim ruins his own wedding.”

Meanwhile, Pam is pregnant and a baby will soon enter the picture. But Steve Carell assures fans the show won't go from funny to cheesy:

“I don’t’ think the show will become The Office Baby,” he said, while Lieberstein adds that “we’re certainly not going to ignore the kid.  But one of the things that’s great about being an office comedy is kids don’t really come to work with you.”