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Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (19 Votes)
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Recap

It turns out that Shawn is in MIchael's office to promote him. He thinks the current version of "The Good Place" is a success and is thrilled with Michael. He wants to expand the current project, which Michael will oversee. Michael is now a member of the senior staff, his dream job.

The four humans wait in the lobby next to Michael's office. Tahani tells Jason they need to talk about what happened yesterday.

Shawn invites the humans into the office, and Michael "reveals" that they're actually in the Bad Place. The humans play along, but they are confused as to why Michael is telling them in front of Shawn. Shawn says they need to be studied and will be sent to the real Bad Place, where their brains will be removed and they'll be tortured forever.

Eleanor asks Michael if he's telling the truth, and Michael taunts the humans, asking if they really thought learning ethics and reading Kierkegaard would make them better.

Michael decides to throw a farewell party before shutting down the neighborhood.

Shawn calls Janet to demonstrate that she will be of no help. She is wearing glowing handcuffs and acting drunk. The handcuffs are made of magnets, which make her act drunk.

At Eleanor's house, the humans discuss how Michael has betrayed them. Chidi believes they should trade the information about the neighborhood's many reboots with Shawn for a reduced sentence. Tahani wants to try to get to Mindy St. Claire's house. Jason tries to weigh in, but Tahani shuts him down.

Eleanor thinks they should blindly assume Michael is still on their side. Her evidence is that Michael referenced Kierkegaard, sending them a message to take a leap of faith. She mentions the human-like chat she had with Michael recently and that she believes he's changed. The others are skeptical.

Vicky bursts into Michael's office, where he is talking with Shawn. Michael goes into the hallway to talk to her, where she accuses him of taking all the credit for her hard work. He says that if he gives her credit, Shawn will know this isn't really the second attempt. He tells Vicky to spread the word: no one should talk about the reboots. Vicky agrees, but demands Michael make it right. She wants a promotion too.

At an event in the town center, Vicky sees Michael whispering something in Janet's ear. Michael calls the meeting to order, explaining that it's a roast of the four humans. He tells cruel jokes about all four. He pokes fun at Jason's intelligence, and obsession with "Derek Bortles" of the Jacksonville Jaguars.

Michael points out how Tahani was constantly outshone by her sister, and he says the worst part of her life was when the last song played at her parties and she'd run off and cry because she still hadn't won her parents' approval. 

He calls Eleanor a manipulative demon and derides her for thinking she deserved a Medium Place: she belongs right here. He also brings attention to her unrequited love for Chidi.

Michael says that no one likes Chidi and says that all his students secretly wished it had been Chidi under the trolley when he taught the trolley problem.

Michael announces the start of the party, and Eleanor says she may have been wrong about him.

Chaos surrounds the humans on the night of the party. They discuss their options and start to agree on a plan, while Jason laments that Michael forgot the name of his favorite quarterback. Eleanor seems to have an epiphany.

Elsewhere at the party, Michael whispers something in Janet's ear and Vicky sees. Vicky asks Michael if he's told Shawn how important she is yet, and Michael says he'll get to it.

Michael walks away, and Vicky asks Janet what he's been whispering to her. Janet says "something something Vicky something something." Vicky tries to take Janet's handcuffs off and asks for a a fellow demon's help. The other demon refuses, saying Shawn put them on for a reason.

The next morning, DJ Bad Janet plays the last song. Vicky comes up to Michael and Shawn and starts to tell him the truth, but Michael interrupts as a train leaves the station. He says the humans are escaping. Vicky says it's all Michael's doing and quickly leaves.

Shawn gets Bad Janet to call another train. Michael says it's impossible for a human to have gotten Janet's bracelet's off. The demon Vicky asked for help appears and accuses Vicky. Michael agrees with her, and Vicky admits that she tried but failed to get the bracelets off.

Vicky bets the humans are still there, so Bad Janet scans the neighborhood for them and doesn't find them. Shawn puts Vicky in a cocoon.

Shawn says the humans bought themselves some time, but they can get them back from Mindy's. He plans to start the extradition papers and asks Michael to stay in the neighborhood, which will need to be erased.

As the train pulls away, we see that the humans were lying on the tracks below it. Michael cries with relief that they figured it out, because he was so worried about them.

Janet asks them to explain what went on, since she's been magnet drunk for a day.

We see a flashback to Eleanor's epiphany at the party. She thinks Michael calling Blake Bortles "Derek Bortles" was intentional. They're supposed to use Derek somehow. They head to the train station.

They try to figure out other clues based on the roast. They notice it was odd that Michael says Tahani left when the last song was played. The humans decide this means they should wait to leave until the end of the party, when everyone is most distracted, with Derek's help.

Eleanor asks Janet to go get Derek. They plan to have Derek drive the train to Mindy's house, but then Eleanor realizes they need to stay based on what Michael said to her. Saying she's exactly where she belongs means that Michael wants them to stay there.

Her fellow humans disagree and ask where they are supposed to hide, but Chidi realizes the answer is in his roast: they need to go under the train.

Eleanor tells Derek to take the train after the last song plays. When the new train arrives, the four humans crawl underneath before anyone can see them.

Michael is thrilled that they figured it out. Chidi says they figured out all four clues, but it turns out that Michael left over 1200--their brains were too primitive to figure them all out.

Tahani asks how Michael escaped detection. He did so by framing Vicky. He whispered, "Something something Vicky something something," into Janet's ears to arouse Vicky's suspicion and cause her to try to take Janet's bracelets off.

Michael apologizes for roasting them, saying he had to do it.

Tahani wants to take a moment to appreciate that they won and might finally have a chance to go to the real Good Place.

Eleanor hopes Mindy likes the present they sent her.

Derek arrives at Mindy's front door with a note attached to him thanking her for all the times she helped the humans. It says they're giving her a willing sex robot and two duffel bags full of cocaine. Derek explains his wind chime genitalia, which Mindy says she can work with. Derek is excited as Mindy pulls him inside.

Show:
The Good Place
Season:
Episode Number:
9
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The Good Place Season 2 Episode 9 Quotes

You guys! I was so scared for you!

Michael

Jason: I vote we...
Tahani: No, sorry, and no offense Jason, but the stakes here are too high to let someone with your limited intellectual processing capacity weigh in.