Hey, if the living can't do enough to muck things up, there are always those in the grave from which to mine stories, right?
Alright, that's not fair. Not all of the visions of the dead were bringing bad tidings, but the new Sage storyline is borderline ridiculous.
I'll be theorizing on that, chatting about Ben's new attitude now that Damien Thorne has been sent away and a lot more.
Let's dig in!
The good news of the week comes down to Ben and Abby, who finally said goodbye to Damien Thorne. The little Omen child was found unfit for the real world.
That's no big surprise, but what was a surprise was Ben's sudden attitude shift. He started out accepting Abby's shoulder to cry on, then wanting her to be with him when they discussed the kid's future with the professionals.
This was a huge change from him pushing her away and siding with the boy come hell or high water earlier. By the end of the week, he admitted to Ashley how terribly he felt about letting Abby down and not protecting her.
This was the Ben I liked when he first came on the canvas. Dr. Ben, hero dude. When he picked Abby up as if to carry her over a threshold, it made their story complete. They haven't had a single minute of married life. Fingers crossed this means something new going forward.
Nick got his hands on Sage's possessions, and that sent Sharon into a bit of a tailspin. She really needs to tell the truth, but I understand her position. I'm the girl who lied to her parents about a report card full of Ds and Fs one quarter, waiting for the school to send home notification.
The reveal was inevitable. I just procrastinated, suffered from the worst anxiety known to any teen for no reason and cried a lot when found out. I can only imagine Sharon thinks she's strengthening the familial bond with Sully.
Then that stupid "Adam killed Constance" allegation had to come out just as she was about to tell Dylan the truth, and she felt vindicated yet again in keeping her secret.
First of all, since when does a diary entry spark ANY police investigation? I'm embarrassed. Yes, Adam and Jack used a diary to set up Victor in the past, so karma is a bitch, but still. The whole idea behind it is ridiculous.
Did Sage really write what was in the diary? If she did, then here's what I'm thinking. There was a much more sinister side to Sage than we knew. She created a Gabe lookalike because they were poisoning Constance to get her money, Gabe was double crossing her, Adam would never know that.
Constance died, it looked like natural causes, no need to bring it up in the real world, but just in case, she made a note of it in her diary. Meanwhile, she fell deep in friendship with Adam and never thought her diary would come into play. Whoops.
The other possibility? Victor really is setting up Adam. In that case, I need to know why Sage conveniently left blank pages in her clearly non-spiral journal allowing for editing in her narrative.
All told, I think the story stinks. But I also think it will in some way lead to the Sully/Christian reveal, and Nick will be kicking himself in the arse because it will also reveal Adam as the baby daddy.
We had to suffer through Nikki and Neil falling off the wagons again. Will we never see the end of those stories? Can we not have some new alcoholics if we must continue the journey? They are not good for the cause. Quite frankly, they lead a gal to drink.
All of Nikki's tribulations led her to the decision divorce was the answer. That was handy since Victor was also thinking about things, and those things included sexy times with Dr. Gates.
That's right. Victoria wasn't the only Vic Newman getting it on with a new partner, and wasn't the only Vic Newman who had absolutely no chemistry with said new partner.
While daughter Vic was vying for the title of Most Boring Barfly Named Tori, Vic the Prisoner was holding Meredith's face in his hands, saying how he knew he could never have her and blah blah blah. Um...ugh?
His recollection of his father was a lot better, especially because it reminded us of a rather nice time in Mr. Newman's life (and of a time when he recalled he was Christian Miller, which ties in with the baby and all).
Had he chosen to have an affair with Meredith at that time, they would have looked better. His slicked back hair and prison garb don't work for the too-young doc. It's unethical, and he seems to have forgotten he's married.
Sharon's web of lies brought Mariah into the thick of things, and it made Kevin wish she would "move home." Thank goodness Mariah is getting story away from Kevin, but also yay that Kevin realizes how much he misses her. I always liked those two so much, and it's terrible to see her so alone when she's so stressed now.
There aren't a lot of friendships at the moment. With Abby's marriage, she could have used a friend. Why haven't they explored something between Abby and Mariah? They're both strong and protective. What didn't work before would work now.
Another woman who will soon need a friend is Phyllis. She's burning the bridge with her two best friends, Jack and Billy. Their whole situation is a mess.
Phyllis and Billy have been unable to stay away from each other since Jason Thompson took over the role. You can't deny chemistry. What was a great friendship has turned into something else.
There's nothing left between Vic and Billy nor Jack and Phyllis. They seem like old married couples, which is just not exciting for young, exciting and hot actors on a soap opera. Their marriages will be doomed until they find a spark similar to what Gina and Jason share.
Someone new is coming into Billy's life next week, though, that could upend the entire thing. If Billy feels like Phyllis won't give him the time of day, but she really wants to be pursued, what will she do if he ends up spending time with someone else?
We might be finding out soon! What did you guys think of all the developments this week? What's going to happen with the journal? Will Victor and Dr. Gates go farther than a kiss? Drop me a comment.
Carissa Pavlica is the managing editor and a staff writer for TV Fanatic. Follow her on Twitter.