Characters don’t have to be on a crime show to prove their ability to take care of certain tasks.
Burying a body isn’t for the weak which is something that all these TV characters have in common. Although that doesn’t mean these characters are bad, in fact, this means they are resourceful and intelligent.
If you needed help in the middle of the night these are the people to call, just expect to form a real bond with them afterward.
There is just something about committing a crime together that kickstarts a beautiful friendship.
Below is a slideshow that explores some of the best characters for the body burying job.
John Murphy – The 100
Murphy may have changed during the six year time jump before the newest season of The 100, but something tells me that he still has muscle memory when it comes to certain skills. He could definitely help you out, in a non-criminal way of course.
Dory Sief – Search Party
Burying a body isn’t anything new for Dory, in fact she has experience with two people now. If you are looking for a partner in crime with a moral compass, Dory should be your top choice.
Xander McClure – Siren
Xander ended up having to lie about his father’s death during the first season of Siren, so you could say that he knows what he is like. Just make sure it is an accident and that it involves the supernatural, Xander is all about that.
Michael – The Good Place
You could count on Michael to think of a good plan to get you out of this sticky situation, the only issue is how would you know that he wasn’t the one to set this all up in the first place? That is the true bad place.
Blaine DeBeers – iZombie
Blaine has the reputation to assist with burying a body, it is probably easier to let him do all the work. Make sure though that you don’t end up owing him because he might collect it in the worst way possible.
Caroline Forbes – The Originals
Caroline has had her far share of messy clean ups, and she will make sure there is no evidence left behind. The perfect part about asking her though is the conversation that you could have with her as she helps. If you need a sounding board Caroline is your best bet.
Kai Anderson – American Horror Story: Cult
Chances are Kai is already planning his usual body drop off so yours will be in addition to his regular route. My only piece of advice is for you to make sure that you don’t drink his Kool-Aid, literally and figuratively.
Riverdale Core Group – Riverdale
The core few in Riverdale know a little bit about mysterious deaths and a situation going the wrong way. There is strength in numbers, and it couldn’t get any better than this well practiced crowd.
Annalise Keating – How To Get Away With Murder
Now you wouldn’t exactly go to Annalise Keating when you need help with a body, but that is only because the dead body was already there. Don’t worry though, Annalise will give you all the steps on how to make it disappear and there will be limited bumps along the way.
Dawn Duguin – Slasher: Guilty Party
No one in Slasher was innocent, in fact that should be their poster motto. Dawn though is prepared in a way that not everyone is, maybe that is why she made it out of those woods alive. She can’t promise that the body won’t disappear some point later, but you will have a couple of years where you won’t worry about it much.
Mona Vanderwaal and Alison DiLaurentis – The Perfectionists
It is a huge understatement to say that Mona and Alison have had their fair share of dead bodies. Things may have calmed down a bit after their Pretty Little Liars days, but now they are pulled back into that world in The Perfectionists. Mona has the skills and Alison has the determination to make sure no clues will lead back to you.
Billy Hargrove – Stranger Things
Billy could probably help you bury a body, but odds are he killed the person first. His final showdown with Steve left our favorite babysitter on the verge of real danger, so before you call Billy maybe don’t?
Dina Fox – Superstore
Here are the rules, Dina will only help stage the dead body in the Cloud 9 store if it is Halloween and the body was already there.
