Michael: Alright, how about the Phyllis/Angela dispute?
Angela: You already did me.
Michael That's what she said.

Angela: Do you want to give Michael your urine?
Dwight: I want him to have all the urine he needs.

Jan: Dress for the job you want, not the job you have
[interview]
Angela: Judging from her attire, Jan aspires to be a whore.

Phyllis: Angela, who would you choose? Jim or Roy?
Angela: It's none of our business. Roy.

Angela: Hey, come inside and talk to me.
Dwight: I can't! Do you want us to run aground, woman?

I actually look forward to performance reviews. I did the youth beauty pageant circuit, and I enjoyed that quite a bit. I really enjoy being judged. I believe I hold up very well to even severe scrutiny.

Angela

Kevin: [to Angela, who is role-playing as a Jamaican] Do you wanna go to the beach?
Angela: Sure.
Kevin: Do you wanna get high?
Angela: No.
Kevin: I think you do... mon.

The Office Quotes

Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.

Michael

When I was in college I used to get wicked hammered. My nickname was Puke. I would chug a fifth of SoCo, sneak into a frat party, polish off a few people's empties, some brewskies, some Jell-O shots, do some body shots off myself, pass out, wake up the next morning, puke, rally, more SoCo, head to class. Probably would have gotten expelled if I had let it affect my grades, but I aced all my courses. They called me Ace. It was totally awesome. Got straight Bs. They called me Buzz.

Andy