NCIS
Mondays 8:00 PM on CBSPopular Anthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Bishop: Seriously? How'd you get that?
Tony: Well, it's like Gorillas in the Midst. You'll get to understand his grunts.
Ziva: So this is where a redthroat would hang out after being overseas for months.
Tony: It's not redthroat, it's redneck.
Ziva: Oh.
Tony: Oil business has Benham Parsa written all over it.
Gibbs: FBI?
McGee: They don't think there's a connection. Intel shows that Parsa's still underground.
Zoe: You've got to get your lies straight, DiNozzo.
Tony: DiNozzo. You've never gone surname on me before.
Zoe: You've never gone liar on me.
Lodge owner: I swear, the old witch is psychic. If I have so much as a thought of another woman...
Tony: You don't have to answer that.
Lodge owner: I have to.
Gibbs: Hey! You got something to say?
Bishop: Not in a million years.
Tony: Actually, I just want you to know I understand completely. I do. There's nothing more enticing than forbidden fruit. Especially the kind you can spoon with.
This was no boating accident.
McGee: Sleep deprivation affects high level cognitive functions, cardiovascular health, circulation.
Tony: You just Googled that on the ride over didn't you?
Tony: There's no way Petty Officer Muldoon would have taken him three shots to drop that guy. He would have nailed him on the first shot. He's a pro!
Leah: Yeah, well pros do miss on the first shot. You sure as hell did. Listen. Tony. You're clearly somewhere else and I'm starting to think that I should be too.
Tony: Oh no. I'm so sorry. Please, give me a second chance.
Leah: Here's my email.
Tony: Oh. Okay. When can I see you again?
Leah: Never. I just really want to know how this case you've been talking about for the last hour, turns out.
Manheim: He still lives with his mother? I want a DNA test.
Tony: Abby's already run it. Congrats. It's a boy. Sort of.
We live in a strange world, McGee. I miss the days when computer nerds looked like you.
Palmer: Hey, are you coming back to work?
Tony: Of course I am. Why wouldn't I/
Palmer: I don't know. You're a single dad now, Tony. An agent in the line of fire. Wasn't sure you'd want to juggle.
