You're growth might be good for the bottom line, but ours allows us to save lives.

Cuddy: You bet someone you could use malaria as a diagnostic tool?
House: That doesn't sound like me.

Wilson: You try Lucas?
Cuddy: He's either sleeping or avoiding me.
Wilson: You in a fight?
Cuddy: Not yet, but we're gonna be.

I won't report the theft to the DEA, but I have to fire you.

I don't care how interesting it is. You are not infecting him with malaria.

Lucas: It says emergency page.
Cuddy: Ignore it.
Lucas: Sweet.

There is no "us." There never will be.

Cuddy: Which one of us slipped through a worm hole to an alternative dimension?
House: I've always loved to travel.

Dr. Cuddy: Tell me what you came here for, House.
House: I've got a legitimate medical excuse.
Dr. Cuddy: You must be so proud.
House: I've forgotten it. I guess it's no big deal, since I was only using it as an excuse to come check out Patty and Selma.
Dr. Cuddy: I feel bad. I haven't named your testicles.
House: Word on the street is you set a new personal best for low-cut.
Dr. Cuddy: I don't know why you chose to give them the names of someone's aunts.
House: It's a compliment. They're always smokin'.

Cuddy: This is the part where you play the employee and I play the boss.
House: I can see your nipples. Your turn.

Cuddy: What's your plan?
House: First, we take Berlin. Then, we circle around Poland and yell: "surprise!"

Cuddy: No procedures. No patient contact.
House: I think I can probably deal with that one.

House Quotes

[To Foreman} That'd be redundant. I've got an angry black guy waiting for me to drop the soap right here.

House

(To Cuddy) If it turns out she has Meningitis, you're right, you win. But if we go back downstairs and she dies, pfft... your face will be so red!

House