Dr. Venture: Oh, if that suit could talk.
Hank: It would say "Kill me, I am a hideous monster."

Dr. Orpheus: changing the terms of my child support.
The Alchemist: Remember when your wife use to screw you without paperwork.

Dr. Orpheus: She must be in her fourties...
The Master: Really Orpheus? Tell it to the heiny, because she thinks it's still 1992.

The Alchemist: Great, so we take credit for killing Torrid, you take credit for kicking the Outrider's ass. Then we make a secret pact to never speak of this again.
Dr. Orpheus: I've been wrong about the Outrider. He was noble and good. We can't leave him like this.
The Alchemist: Okay, we drop a rock on his head, then we make a secret pact to never speak of this again.

Dr. Orpheus: Triad! Be unseen!
Jefferson Twilight: Was something supposed to happen? Are we invisible now, or something?
Dr. Orpheus: No, I meant that we should hide. Just like behind something.
The Alchemist: Well be specific next time.

Dr. Orpheus: The time is now! Triad, join me! For I am Dr. Orpheus! Master of Mysticism!
The Alchemist: I don't want to do that introducing ourselves bit. It's goofy. let's not die being goofy.
Jefferson Twilight: I'm with Al. Maybe we could sing a Stevie Wonder song together.
The Alchemist: Yeah, that's not much better.

Good night, you princes of Venture. You kings of sleepover

Dr. Orpheus: Punkin', get me my cloak!
Triana: Why don't you wear the...
Dr. Orpheus: Oh fine. Get me my blue windbreaker!

Dr. Orpheus: What is...?
Brock: It's Doc's deformed twin brother - he absorbed in the womb but he's come back for revenge, but now they've made up, so...
Dr. Orpheus: 'kay...

Dr. Orpheus: Pumpkin, you're up early, and you've changed out of your jam-jams into...the clothes you wore last night. How frugal of you. Did you just get home?
Triana: Kim was totally plastered, and then we were like...
Dr. Orpheus: Sweetie, let me love you - don't make this hard for us

Dr. Orpheus: Now we have the Venture twins staying with us, and they're not in the den. I sense something is amiss. Is there, something else you forgot to tell daddy?
Triana: They ran away.
[Dr. Orpheus gasps]
Triana: They said they were going to the city to become famous lion tamers

There is a television behind the El Greco. Sadly, the remote has vanished from the material sphere...

Venture Bros. Quotes

Hank: You are not the boss of me
Sgt Hatred: Au contraire, I am tony danza to your spunky Alyssa Milano. I am full on Charles In Charge of you

Hank: Is it just me or does every Nazi want to clone Hitler? It's like the only they think about
Srgt. Hatred: It seems that way, right. I guess when everyone hates you, you just fixate on making rotten Hitlers