Grey's Anatomy
Thursdays 9:00 PM on ABCIzzie Stevens Quotes
Alex: Ok, that tastes like crap.
Izzie: Alex.
Alex: The shrimp tastes sweet and spicy. Kind of like our first date. The good part, the part before I didn't kiss you on the porch.
Izzie: Ok, nice.
Alex: The chicken, tastes like a drive to the beach with the windows down and the dog hanging out the window. Like when you're a kid. It's salty. Tastes good. But, I'd definitely vote for the shrimp if we have to choose.
Izzie: There's one more.
Alex: Ok, yeah. Yeah, that tastes like crap!
Bailey: Ok, the OR's prepped and ready. How 'bout you?
Izzie: Yeah, I'm ready. (Alex kisses her) Now, that tastes like crap.
Mrs Stevens: Are you sure you don't want me to stay?
Izzie: I'm sure. I'm ok. I'll be ok.
Mrs Stevens: Well, if you're not, you know where to find me.
Izzie: I love you mom. I love you so much. But, we do better loving each other from a distance.
Mrs Stevens: You were always too good for that trailer park. That I knew. I may not know that much, and I may not be quite as smart as you. I always knew that.
Mrs Stevens: I think It's gonna be fine. I think those mats are gonna be just teeny tiny.
Izzie: It's ah, Mets mom. Mets.
Mrs Stevens: Mets? Like baseball?
Izzie: Yeah, like baseball.
Bailey: Ah, good news. Great news. The cancer's practically gone. It's... it looks like your psychic was right. Miss Stevens. It looks like we caught it early after all.
Mrs Stevens: Oh! Oh thank you god. Thank you. Oh, my baby. Jesus, Mary and Joseph thank you. Thank you. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.But I new it. Didn't I. I knew it. I knew. Because you're my cricket. Nothing can hurt you.
Izzie: I love you mom.
Mrs Stevens: I love you too baby girl. I love you so, so much. God look at me, I must be a mess. Well, I'm gonna go clean up ok. And then ah, then I'm gonna call Jade, and Miss Norris. I got them all so worried.
Izzie: Just tell me.
Bailey: The mets have shrunk some, but there are new mets, to several new mets in the small bowel
Izzie: No surgery then.
Bailey: Oh, I'm gonna operate. I'm going to take out absolutely everything I can. Be as aggressive as I can. Then we'll take it from there.
Izzie: Ok.
Bailey: Ok.
Mrs Stevens: Oh, the lovers card. Do you know what this means?
Izzie: Yes. No. Yes. I'm, um, mom. Can you please just shut up.
Alex: It's meat. It's definitely some kind of meat.
Izzie: You're killin me. You know that?
Mrs Stevens: It means that the sex is hot. Hmmm? Now, I bet that little old mole didn't get in the way of that. Am I right?
Izzie: Honey, hey. Isn't it time for my scan? Isn't it time for my scan right now?
Alex: Oh! I'll go check, see if I can get things moving along.
Izzie: Thank you.
Mrs Stevens: So tell me about Dr. Hottie. How long have you all been together?
Izzie: Mom. It's not just a mole. I have stage 4 melanoma. It's in my organs. It's not just a mole.
Mrs Stevens: You don't have skin on your organs, hun. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Don't just sigh at me Izobel. Just, you know. Just explain.
Izzie: Ok, um, you remember when Grammy had that tumor on her thyroid?
Mrs Stevens: Grammy died. She died, she... really soon after that she died. Wh... why are you t... telling me this? You have a mole. I don't understand. You, you just... you have a mole. Wh... what. Wh...
Izzie: Ok. I'm sorry. That was a really bad comparison.
Mrs Stevens: Wh... (starts to get really distraught)
Izzie: What I have is nothing like what Grammy had. Ok, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Mrs Stevens: No.
Izzie: Just breathe. It's ok. I'm alright. Ok. Just breathe. Ok. It's ok. It's ok, I'm ok. Just breathe.
Mrs Stevens: Ahuh, oh really? Ahuh, really? Oh, yeah, that's great. That's great! Oh, thank you. Yeah, thank you hun. Thanks a million. Oh! Oh, that's great news Cricket. You're gonna be just fine.
Izzie: Oh yeah, let me guess, your psychic told you that.
Mrs Stevens: It's not just any old psychic, he's the best that I've ever heard of. Anyway, he said that skin cancer is highly curable if caught early.
Izzie: Oh that's great. A psychic with internet access. Let me guess how much that call cost you mother... $19.99 a minute.
Mrs Stevens: Well when you have a sick child Cricket, moneys not really the first thing on your mind. You seem like a very capable doctor, Dr. Bailey. Can I trust that you caught my daughter's skin cancer early.
Bailey: Um, well, Mrs. Stevens.
Mrs Stevens: Oh no, Call me Robbie hun.
Izzie: No mom. Don't call her hun. Don't call Bailey hun. You know, if you have questions you can just ask me. She's very busy and this thing I have it's complicated.
Mrs Stevens: I know it's complicated Isobel, I'm not a complete idiot. Now, I saw this thing on Tyra Show. There was this woman who had a mole on her private parts, and the dermatologist did not bother to check her privates 'cause she thought that they gyney would have done it. But, the gyney didn't do it. Maybe she didn't even go to the gyney. I don't know. Anyway, It was bad. She was bald and everything. She did not have a mole on her private parts did she?
Bailey: No, ma'am, no. She did not.
Mrs Stevens: Good.
Mrs Stevens: And then you remember Jade, from 114. Well, she had a spot of cancer last year. It was breast cancer. It was such a shame I thought, cos she had such a great rack. God, do you remember what a great rack she had? Oh, you used to do all those little exercises like this to try to get yours to grow like hers.
Izzie: Mom!
Mrs Stevens: Anyway, my point is, Jade, well, she had them cut off. Both of them. Just to be on the safe side. And, they look even better now. For real. Life gave her lemons, and she made cantaloupes. So maybe, I dunno, maybe honey, there's an upside in this for you too. Right?
Izzie: Um, mom, just um, just listen ok? I... I don't have breast cancer. Ok, I have skin cancer. Or, what started out as skin cancer.
Mrs Stevens: Wait, hang on. Skin cancer? Oh, God! Izabel Stevens. Oh, you scared the hell out of me. And then you made me come all the way up here to Seattle just for some ugly old mole. Oh, sweetheart.
Izzie: No, I didn't. Haha, I didn't make you come up here. I ah, I didn't even call you. I'm really... I'm curious, who did? Who called? Who called her? Seriously, who called her?
Izzie: YAY! Oh, that's the one!
Bailey: Very dapper Dr. Shepherd.
Derek: You're serious about this? It's not some cruel joke?
Izzie: You look fantastic. He looks fantastic right?
Meredith: Yeah.
Cristina: Whatever.
Alex: Yeah.
George. Yeah.
Alex: Chicken.
George: Good chicken.
Meredith, Cristina: It's chicken.
Izzie: I know it's chicken! I wanna know what it tastes like.
Alex: Tastes like chicken.
Izzie: I'm having surgery today.
Bailey: Maybe, if the meds are strong.
Izzie: I am maybe having surgery today, and as such I cannot taste the chicken for myself. So I really need you guys to tell me what it tastes like. I need to nail down this dinner, so I can announce it on Meredith and Derek's wedding website.
Meredith: There's a website?
Izzie: So, can you please be a little more articulate than just chicken?
(to Meredith) You make a beautiful bride.
Cristina: 98 over 72. That's good. That's good.
Izzie: Don't. Don't try to make me up better than I am because I'm not. I'm sick.
Cristina: You had an incredibly high dose of IL2 today, this is how you're supposed to feel.
Izzie: All I wanted to do today was flip through magazines, and call caterers, and make Mer try on dresses I knew she'd hate. I thought it would be fun or funny. I thought I could be the same person I was when I woke up this morning, but I'm not. I'm just another patient trapped inside a sick, dieing, cancer ridden body.
Alex: I got you the cheeseburger you ordered from Joe's. Are you sure about this?
Cristina: Are you really ok? Not feeling nauseous?
Izzie: No. I feel good, I feel fine. See.
Lexie: Hi. Oh, french fries! God, I love french fries.
Izzie: Meredith, lets go!
Meredith: (Yells from the bathroom) I feel like this dress is giving me a mammogram. It's squishing my boobs!
Izzie: Let me see it.
Meredith: I'm taking it off!
(Izzie fakes that she can't breathe)
Alex: Iz you ok?
Lexie: I think she's choking.
Cristina: Izzie? Lets hit her with oxygen. Izzie, Izzie! Speak to me, can you say something? Izzie?
(Mer walks out in the wedding dress)
Izzie: Haha, I'm not choking. I'm joking... Hahaha.
Cristina: Ok, you've gotta stop doing that. 'Cause it's not funny!
Izzie: It got Meredith out of the bathroom so I could see her dress, and its gorgeous!
Cristina: Tell her she has to stop!
Meredith: Izzie!
Izzie: It's very romantic, it's pretty right?
Lexie: Pretty... (eats another french fry)
Meredith: And I see you've invited more people to witness my humiliation.
Lexie: No, Derek and Mark still aren't speaking to each other and we're heading into a 6 hour surgery. So, unless I can slip this cheeseburger into a sterile area... I'm not gonna make it! Can you please come and talk to them?
Izzie: Fine, ok, you can go. Cristina will you help her take the dress off?
(Lexie steals the rest of Izzie's fries)
Lexie: I'll be in the scrub room.
Izzie: Lexie just ate all of my fries, can you please get me some more?
Alex: Nice. The IL2 isn't affecting you at all. (Alex leaves)
(Izzie throws up)
Izzie: Isn't there a tiara that goes along with it? Oh, oh put it on. So I can get the full effect.
Meredith: No. No tiara. I told you simple. You know, it's buffalo wings at the reception.
Izzie: You can't have buffalo wings. Caterers don't even do buffalo wings.
Meredith: Iz, this is a small wedding. Small. And, this is a big dress. For a big wedding. Don't you have a dress in your pile that doesn't make noise when it moves, or stand up all by itself?
Izzie: You're getting married! It's a miracle. Meredith Grey, child of darkness, has found someone. Don't you want to celebrate that? It's your day Meredith. You can't just piss it away on some slip dress and a cheese tray from a grocery store. That will just make me so sad, and I don't wanna be sad 'cause I'm already suffering through cancer and that's sad enough.
Meredith: Fine! Give me the tiara. (Mer puts it on)
Izzie: Oh, you're like a princess. Smile.
