Lorelai Gilmore Quotes
(about Max) Okay, well, if it makes you feel any better, while he's being sexy, he's also being grammatically correct.
Lorelai: Michel, it's the first snowfall of the season. It's very lucky! Make a wish!
Michel: Get away from me.
Lorelai: Oh, you're not supposed to say it out loud.
(Michel answers the phone.)
Lorelai: (to herself) The world changes when it snows. It's quiet. Everything softens.
Michel: It's your mother.
Lorelai: And then the rain comes.
Emily: (talking to Lorelai over the phone) Have you seen the news?
Lorelai: Ever?
Emily: A bad storm is heading your way. It's already hitting us here.
Lorelai: Well, don't panic. I'll get the ark, you get the animals.
(to Michel) I am telling you five minutes in a snowball fight we could knock that stick right out of your butt.
Michel: You do know that not everyone finds the idea of being pelted with frozen water appealing.
Lorelai: I know, and how sad for them.
Michel: The thrilling sensation of getting lost in a blizzard, of freezing to death in the woods and having to eat your friend's buttocks to stay alive: that is lost on many people.
Lorelai: (asking about the weather) Hey, how is it out there?
Michel: It is cold and gray, like a fat, dead pigeon.
Lorelai: Wait, close your eyes and breathe. I smell snow.
Rory: Ah, it's that time of year.
Lorelai: Can't you smell it?
Rory: You know, it's like dogs and high-pitched noises. I think it's something only you can smell.
(Rory sits down next to Lorelai and pulls a blanket over the both of them)
Lorelai: I love snow.
Rory: Really, I had no idea.
Lorelai: Everything's magical when it snows, everything looks pretty. The clothes are great. Coats, scarves, gloves, hats.
Rory: Thermal underwear, wool socks, ear flaps.
Mayor: I have been mayor of this fine town for a long time. I tend to think of all of you as my children. Unfortunately, sometimes children have to be disciplined. Now I'm going to say something and I'm only gonna say it once. . .we have leash laws, people.
Lorelai: Daddy's getting angry.
Lorelai: Hey do you wanna talk? I'm not Rory, but we do use the same blow dryer.
Lane: I did something really stupid tonight.
Lorelai: Okay, what'd you pierce?
Lane: Nothing. I touched a boy's hair.
Lorelai: Okay.
Lane: A boy I really like.
Lorelai: So far I'm missing the stupid part.
Lane: I kind of did it without his permission.
Lorelai: Now we're getting somewhere.
Lane: I don't know what happened. I mean I was just standing there and then he bends over and his hair falls forward and suddenly it's like my hand has a life of its own.
Lorelai: Sounds like your hand had a little help from your hormones.
Lane: God I was so humiliated! I can't ever go back to school. I'll have to be home schooled, my mother finally gets her way.
Lorelai: Look at it from a different perspective. You have so many years of screw ups ahead of you, view this as a trial run for really grown-up humiliation.
Lane: So not helping.
Lorelai: Maybe you should be a hair-dresser.
Lane: Lorelai!
Lorelai: Yes, it's perfect. Then you can run your hands through anybody's hair you want and they'll pay you for it.
Lane: What am I going to do? Everyone at school is going to be talking about it. I can't show my face.
Lorelai: Everybody does stupid things in high school. It's like a requirement.
Lane: Not like this!
Lorelai: No, some people get pregnant! Talk about something really juicy for the gossip mill.
Lorelai: Sorry I woke you up.
Rory: That's okay, it's all fodder for the tell all.
(to Rory)
Lorelai: Hey Sweets! I have a locksmith coming to the house today like 5ish, and I don't know how long it will take, so will you tell Grandma and Grandpa that I'm gonna be late? And that I'm having Satan's baby? You pick the order.
Rory: I'll relay the time message, but I'm leaving the rest up to you
(about Max's message)
Rory: So how many times are you gonna listen to that?
Lorelai: Till it stops being sexy.
Rory: Stop. That's my teacher you're taling about. I have to respect him.
Lorelai: Okay, well if it makes you feel any better, while he's being sexy, he's also being grammatically correct.
Rory: Better. Thank you.
