Popular Marshall Eriksen Quotes
Marshall: Ted, how do I explain this to you. Last night, I ate the best cake of my life. Do you think I'm gonna let that cake out of my life? Hell, no. I'm gonna find out what bakery made that cake and I'm gonna get some more cake.
Ted: That cake really got to you?
Marshall: It haunts me.
A drum roll?! That's it? So what you just said good night, came home and performed a drum solo?
Ted: I had the most amazing night ever.
Marshall: Tell me about it! That cake. Best cake I ever had. Seriously, my stomach was like "Hey bro, I don't know what you're eating cause I don't have any eyes but it's basically awesome so keep sending it down."
Lily: Yea I know, my stomach was like "Girlfriend, we don't always get along but that cake..."
Lily: Baby, I need to do something and I can't do it in front of you. It will change the nature of our relationship.
Marshall: What is it?
Lily: I need to pee
Barney: Ladies, gentlemen, Ted. This has been a wonderful evening. I got great dirt on all you guys. I got Ted to tell the Re-return. I finally nailed Shannon. Told her I'd call her tomorrow...yeah, right! And I rediscovered how awesomely awesome my life is. Peace out, hombres!
Marshall: I think Barney just won game night
Backgammon sucks. I took the only good part of backgammon, the gammon, and I left the rest of it in the trash where it belongs
Marshall
Marshall: Well, we have the whole place to ourselves...
Lily: I'm thinking...floor sex!
Marshall: Sounds reasonable
Victoria: I will tell you my most humiliating story.
Marshall: Yeah, Victoria! Way to step up.
Victoria: OK, it involves a game of Truth or Dare, a squeeze bottle of marshmallow ice cream topping, and the hot tub at my grandparent's retirement community.
Future Ted: ... Kids, I tell you a lot of inappropriate stories, but there's no way I'm telling you this one. Don't worry, it wasn't that great...
Marshall: That is the greatest story ever!
Victoria, that was an honest and mature answer. You may advance to the Gumdrop Mountains
Lily: You ralphed and ran?
Marshall: I thought you were vomit free since 93. So that was a lie.
Robin: You re-returned for me. That's really sweet, though you kinda ruined my customized Scherbatsky doormat
Barney: Marshall, I should feel tremors of psych-itude rock my body like a seizure. That was like a declawed, pregnant cat on a porch swing idly swatting at a fly on a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Marshall: Wow, that was really specific
Ted: I've been there for all the big moments of you and Lily: the night you met, your first date, other first things...
Marshall: Huh-uh-uh, yeah, sorry, we thought you were asleep.
Ted: It's physics Marshall, if the bottom bunk moves the top bunk moves too
