Popular Marshall Eriksen Quotes
Marshall: I want to give you the package.
Lily: The package? You've already given me the package, you've got a great package, Marshall, I love your package.
Marshall: Lily, you are the most incredible woman I know. You deserve a big package.
Lily: Your package has always been big enough. You may not realize this Marshall Erickson, but you've got a huge package!
Lily: I made you a sack lunch [giggles]
Marshall: I love you because, one, you made me a sack lunch, and two, you laugh every time you say the word "sack."
Marshall: Well, I'm better friends with Ted than you are.
Barney: That is a lie!
Marshall: It is not a lie.
Barney: Okay, that's it! You and me! I'm not afraid of you!
Marshall: I'll show you things you never seen before!
Barney: I used to box in the Army
Ted, I don't want to swear in front of Korean Elvis, but what the bleep are you doing, dude?
Marshall: Look Barney you tried I think that's great but we're going.
Barney: No! No! Come on.
Marshall: Yes!
Barney: Dude! We haven't hit legendary yet, we're only at the Le, we still got the Gen, the Da, the Ry.
Lily: Ok if were at the Le then I say we follow it up with the Tss go home.
Marshall: Oh wow you just got burned phonic style
Marshall: Ted, what does your mom always say?
Ted: Nothing good ever...
Marshall: Nothing good ever happens after 2 a.m.
Barney: That's adorable Ted. You're such a hayseed. The companionship business is the growth industry of the 21st century. You do realize that 1 out of every 8 adult women in America is a prostitute.
Marshall: Dude you just made that up.
Barney: Withdrawn.
Marshall: Lawyered!
Barney: Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it's the world's oldest profession.
Marshall: You really think that's true?
Barney: Oh yea, I bet even Cro-Magnons used to give cave hookers, like, an extra fish for putting out.
Marshall: Ah ha, so the oldest profession would be fishermen. Kaboom! You've been lawyered!
Ted: Look, I shouldn't go.
Marshall: You should definitely go, look, it's a chance to show her you are still friends and that you support her.
Barney: Or it's a chance to mess with her head by showing up with someone hotter, or even better, triple threat, hotter and bigger boobs!
Ted: That's only two.
Barney: Count again!!
Barney: We'll just sneak in.
Marshall: We are not sneaking in to a high school prom.
Lily: Yes we are, it's the only way.
Ted: You are getting on board with Barney's idea? Man, you really have snapped
Marshall: It'll be cool. I'll tell you what, we'll make a game out of it. First one to stuff a hundred invitations gets a big prize.
Ted: Do I look like I'm four? ... All right, what kind of prize are we talking about?
Ted: I've been there for all the big moments of you and Lily: the night you met, your first date, other first things...
Marshall: Huh-uh-uh, yeah, sorry, we thought you were asleep.
Ted: It's physics Marshall, if the bottom bunk moves the top bunk moves too
