Paris Geller Quotes
Paris: I wish my mother would sleep with my teachers, it would make midterms a lot easier.
Rory : (stands up, fuming) Madeline, Louise, would you excuse us for a minute?
Madeline: Ooh, cat fight.
Rory: You know what, I don't want my change, money makes people shallow.
(Rory walks away)
Paris: I've got your change. Hey! Hey! If you think I'm keeping this dollar, I'm not!
Boy next to Paris: I'll take it.
Paris: Shut up!
(Paris, Madeline, and Louise are walking behind Rory talking about her "D")
Paris: A "D," however, that would be cause for concern.
Louise: A cry for help.
Paris: A job application at McDonald's.
Louise: "Would you like fries with that?"
Paris: Hey, you know, not everybody can be smart. As my mother always says, "somebody has to answer the phones."
Madeline: Okay, I have no idea what you two are talking about.
Paris: No, but Rory does.
Paris: (to Madeline about Rory) Loser.
Rory: (to Paris) And just what is wrong with you? You already have everything! You have the grades, the status--what the hell is wrong with you that you have this constant need to be the biggest jerk in the entire world?
Mr. Medina: Okay, let's go.
Rory: Huh? What's up? What's up, quippy? Why so silent?
Mr. Medina: Outside, now!
Rory: (to Tristin) And for the last time, THE NAME IS RORY!
(to Rory) You'll never beat me. This school is my domain and the Franklin is my domain. And don't you ever forget that.
Paris: (looking through Rory's file) Lorelai Gilmore.
Louise: Nice stripper name.
Paris: Formerly of Stars Hollow High School.
Louise: Where's that?
Paris: Drive west, make a left at the haystacks and follow the cows.
Louise: Ooh, a dixie chick.
Paris: Why are they letting all these extra people in? They just take up space and screw up the curve. We don't need any new kids here.
Louise: Too late.
