Rachel Green Quotes
Monica: (Looking out the window) Oh, my God. You guys! You gotta come see this! There's some creep out there with a telescope!
Ross: I can't believe it! He's looking right at us!
Rachel: Oh, that is so sick.
Chandler: I feel violated. And not in a good way.
Phoebe: How can people do that?
(Pause)
Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!
Rachel: (To Monica, quietly) We ended up having sex in his chair.
Monica: (Loudly) You had sex in his chair?!... I said that a little too loudly, didn't I?
Ross: You, you had what?
Phoebe: Sex in his chair.
Luisa: Luisa Gianetti! Lincoln High? I sat behind you guys in home room!
Rachel: Luisa? Oh, my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
Monica: The Luisa from home room!
Rachel: Yes!
Luisa: You have no idea who I am, do you?
Monica: No, none at all.
Rachel: It would be different if I had somebody.
Ross: Really? What happened to, "forget relationships, I'm done with men"? The whole penis embargo?
Monica: Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
Rachel: Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
Monica: Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?
Rachel: Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for inspiration. Oh, my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
Monica: Barry who you almost--?
Rachel: Barry who I almost.
Monica: And Mindy, your maid of--?
Rachel: Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
Monica: He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
Rachel: I don't know. The left one.
Monica: Which ones?
Rachel: Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
Phoebe: (Entering the apartment) Hey.
All: Hi.
Phoebe: Whoa, ooh, why is the air in here so negative?
Chandler: Rachel lost Marcel.
Phoebe: Oh no, how?
Monica: He, he pooped in my shoe.
Phoebe: Which one?
Monica: Those cute little black ones I wear all the time.
Phoebe: No, which one? The right or left? 'Cause the left one is lucky...
Ross: All right, I want my monkey.
Luisa: No!
Rachel: Oh, come on, Luisa!
Luisa: Sorry, prom queen.
Ross: (To Rachel) You had to be a bitch in high school, you couldn't have been fat.
Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, okay? I cannot be a waitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called "Excuse me..."
Rachel: Hmmm, it's so typical: 'Ooh... I'm a man, ooh... I have a penis, ooh... I have to win money to observe my power over women.'
Rachel: Can you believe what a jerk Ross was being?
Monica: Yeah, I know. He can get really competitive.
Phoebe: Ha, haha.
Monica: What?
Phoebe: Oh, hello, kettle? This is Monica. You're black.
Rachel: (After winning a hand of poker. Sing-song to Ross) I have got your money, and you'll never see it, and your fly's still open.
(Pause)
Rachel: Ha, I made you look.
