Rachel Green Quotes
Ross: (About Isabella Rossellini) Damn! I can't believe I took her off my list.
Monica: Why? 'Cause otherwise you'd go for it?
Ross: Yeah, maybe.
Rachel: Oh oh, you lie.
Ross: What? You don't think I'd go up to her?
Rachel: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
Ross: Yeah, well missy, you better be glad that list is laminated.
Rachel: You know what, honey? You go ahead. We'll call her an alternate.
Ross: Okay, hold my crawler.
Rachel: Okay. (He walks up to the counter.)
Monica: Rach, are you really gonna let him do this?
Rachel: Honey, he's about to go hit on Isabella Rossellini. I'm just sorry we don't got popcorn.
Ross: (About his list) Isabella Rossellini.
Chandler: Ooh hoo. Very hot, very sexy. But, ah, ya know she's too international. Ya know she's never gonna be around.
Rachel: So?
Chandler: So, you gotta play the odds, pick somebody who's gonna be in the country like all the time.
Rachel: Yeah, 'cause that's why you won't get Isabella Rossellini... geography.
Chandler: So I'm not going to lose her?
Rachel: Oh, honey, you're not a total loser.
Chandler: I said, "So I'm not going to lose her?"
Huh. Well that's funny. Ugly Naked Guy's still naked, but his dog's wearing a sweater.
Monica: Pretend like you just woke up, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
Rachel: And grumpy!
Chandler: Would you stop naming dwarves!
Chandler: Janice likes to cuddle at night, which you know I am all for. But, you know when you want to go to sleep, you want some space. So, how do I tell her that without, you know, accidentally calling her fat or something?
Rachel: Oh honey, I'm sorry we can't help you there 'cause were're cuddily sleepers! Okay, I'm late for work. All right, are you guys gonna come down?
Ross: Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm right behind you. (Rachel leaves) Okay the sleeping thing: very tricky business, but there is something you can do.
Chandler: but I thought you guys were cuddily sleepers.
Ross: No! No, not cuddily, not me, I'm like you I need the room.
Chandler: Okay, well Janice said "Hi, do I look fat today?" So I looked at her...
Ross: Whoa, whoa, whoa. You looked at her? You never look. You just answer, it's like a reflex. Do I look fat? No! Is she prettier than I am? No! Does size matter?
Rachel: No!
Ross: And it works both ways.
Rachel: (About the sling on Joey's arm) Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
Joey: No. I had a whole cover story, but Chandler here sold me out.
Chandler: Well, I'm sorry Joe, I didn't think the doctor would buy that it just fell out of the socket.
Chandler: Do I look fat?
Ross & Rachel: No.
Chandler: Okay I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took that to mean that I was calling her a cow.
Monica: Hey, look at me! I'm making jam... been at it since 4 O'clock this morning.
Ross: Where'd you get fruit at four in the morning?
Monica: Went down to the docks. Hey, betcha didn't know you can get it wholesale.
Rachel: I didn't know there were docks.
Joey: Remember when your mom would send you to the movies with a jar of jam and a spoon?
Rachel: (Pats Joey on the head) You're so pretty.
Rachel: You guys, do this look like something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear?
Phoebe: I don't know. You might be the first one.
