Ross Geller Quotes
Monica: Hey, look at me! I'm making jam... been at it since 4 O'clock this morning.
Ross: Where'd you get fruit at four in the morning?
Monica: Went down to the docks. Hey, betcha didn't know you can get it wholesale.
Rachel: I didn't know there were docks.
Ross: (About Monica deciding whether to call Richard) Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen. When Carol and I broke up, I went through the same thing. And you know what I did?
Monica: Huh?
Ross: I... got... dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay.
Ross: (After Joey gets humus on Phoebe's dress) Don't rub it! What gets out hummus? What gets out humus?
Phoebe: Monica, Monica! You know, what gets out hummus?
Monica: If it is a new message, what is he calling to say?
Phoebe: Okay, thanks. Yeah, I'll try that.
Joey: What's the matter, Ross? You nervous about your speech?
Ross: Nope. (Pause) You wanna hear it?
Joey: Am I in it?
Ross: Ya huh. Yeah, right after I thank everyone for giving money to the museum, I sing a song about the wonder that is Joey.
Ross: Joey, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?
Joey: Cause I'm not wearing any underwear now.
Ross: Um, okay ... then, why do you have to wear underwear tonight?
Joey: Cause it's a rented tux, okay? I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigues!
Ross: You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are my star.
Phoebe: Ohh, well, you're my lucky penny.
Ross: Yeah, she finally stopped crying yesterday, but then she found one of Richard's cigar butts out on the terrace ...
Phoebe: Oh, okay, that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought, okay it's, like, a mouse or a possum. But then I realized, like, okay, where would a mouse or a possum get the money to make the phone call?
Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what? She's his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
Joey: There you go! There's the spirit I'm looking for! What can we do? Huh? All right, who's first? Huh? Ross?
Ross: Well, I'm thinking that Chandler's our friend and Janice makes him happy. So I say we all just be adult about it and accept her.
Joey: Yeah, we'll call that Plan B, all right?
I said share, not scare. Sit over there.
Ross: You need to get some sleep.
Monica: I need to get some Richard.
Monica: God, look what I found in the drain.
Rachel: What?!
Monica: It's some of Richard's hair! What do I do with this?
Ross: Getting it away from me would be job one.
Monica: It's weird, but you know what? I don't wanna throw this away. I mean this is like all I have left of him... gross, drain hair. Ooh!
Ross: (About his Princess Leia fantasy) Look, that was supposed to be like a private, personal thing between us.
Rachel: Okay, Ross, Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay, we tell each other everything. You know, I mean, come on, guys do the same thing, I mean, what about all that locker room stuff.
Ross: That's different, okay. That's like, uh "Who dated a stripper?" or "Who did it on the back of the Staton Island Ferry?"
Rachel: Were both of those Joey?
Ross: Yeah. Look, you don't, you don't talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
Rachel: Not even with your best friend?
Ross: No!
Rachel: That is so sad. You're missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and the sharing, you know. And, and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.
Ross: Hmm. So what, you, you tell each other everything?
Rachel: Pretty much.
Ross: Did you talk about the night of five times? Do you tell people about the night of five times?
Rachel: Uh, honey, that was with Carol.
Ross: I know, but it's still worth mentioning, I think.
