NCIS
Mondays 9:00 PM on CBSPopular Ziva David Quotes
Tony: Well, you're off on your own, Ziva. I'm already enlightened. I know exactly where I am. It may not be pretty, but I am DiNozzo. Hear me roar.
Ziva: Like an elephant.
McGee: Lee Wuan Kai: North Korean assassin, one time fanatical nationalist, credited with 27 targeted hits in seven countries, dozens more by association -
Tony: She likes quiet walks on the beach, laughing with friends and playing Frisbee with her Cocker Spaniel Rufus.
Ziva: It does not say that.
Tony: Well it might as well.
Ziva: Look, I'm sure we're not the only ones that need to be rescued. Plus, things could be a lot worse.
McGee: Yeah, how's that?
Ziva: We could be stuck here with Tony.
Ziva: Just ignore him. He's like an annoying bug. Eventually he'll just go away.
McGee: Ziva, it's been five years. Trust me, he's not going anywhere.
Tony: Baby, I'm amazed. A maze of maize.
Ziva: What?!
Tony: Maize. It's the Indian word for corn.
Ziva: The Indian word for corn is maki.
Tony: Not Indians from India! Indians from, you know, here!
Ziva: Well if they were Indians from here then we would be called American Indians, you dork.
Tony: They'd be called Native Americans, Miss Citizenship Test.
Tony: It's a remote control receiver?
McGee: Yes, it is.
Ziva: What is the range?
McGee: Almost a kilometer.
Tony: I don't speak Canadian. How far is that?
Ziva: Slow drivers.
Tony: Bad drivers.
Ziva: What is so hard? You go as fast as possible, when something gets in your way, you turn.
Tony: You're quoting Better Off Dead. I told you to watch that.
Ziva: Okay, so how many amendments to the Constitution?
Gibbs: The Bill of Rights is the first 10, prohibition is 18. I'm guessing 23.
Ziva: Twenty-seven!
Gibbs: Nobody likes a smart ass, David.
Ziva: Why do I have to study all this and you don't?!
Gibbs: I was born here.
Tony: All right, Annie Leibowitz, what's wrong with my pictures?
Nora: Well, they're sort of soulless. Analytical. They look like postcards or -
Ziva: Crime scene photos.
Ziva: A team of Homeland Security officers will be waiting for us when we land. Outside the terminal an NCIS detail will take over.
Marshall Neeley: Not taking any chances in case your new hitman tries something on the ground, huh?
Ziva: Which is why we must consider the possibility they may try something on the plane, where Nora is more vulnerable.
Tony: (on the phone) Hey Probie, what I am looking at?
Vance: A career in the fast food industry.
Tony: Director Vance. How are you, sir?