I'm Howard Grey and, uh, Ed helped himself to our buffet without asking and walked off with two brownies. We waited while he went upstairs to eat and then, after he choked to death on his own rudeness and his cries for help kind of petered out, uh, I propped him up in one of those kitchen chairs and called 911. And, we're very sorry your honor, and we promise never to let someone kill themselves again.

Howard