Caroline: I'm not saying mob money, just saying we'd have a shop too if we had mob money
Max: Sshh! Keep it down, do you want to wake up with Chestnut's head in your vagina bed?

Caroline: What's happening with you? What's your problem with pretty?
Max: Don't wave your divas live hand at me!

This used to be owned by this old Irish guy who had freckles on his penis. Sometimes he'd corner you and flash it, but then he'd always comp you with a free lotto ticket.

Max

What's that you say? I can now afford the waxed floss again?

Caroline

Trust me, you could use a little salsa in your white rice.

Max

Caroline: Where did you get the idea that I only date white guys? For your information, I once had a Spaniard in Monte Carlo.
Max: Isn't that the title of an Abba song?

Johnny: What's Happening"?! Come on dude! You have a literature degree from NYU!
Caroline: I didn't mean to say that but when I get nervous my Rico Suave comes out

Female customer: I don't know who you are or where you came from-"
Max: Neither do I.

I know they're smart because they're the first people to order the Croque Monsieur as Croque Monsieur and not Crock Monster.

Caroline

2 Broke Girls Season 1 Episode 7 Quotes

Female customer: I don't know who you are or where you came from-"
Max: Neither do I.

I know they're smart because they're the first people to order the Croque Monsieur as Croque Monsieur and not Crock Monster.

Caroline