Abbott Elementary
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCAbbott Elementary Season 2 Episode 19: "Festival" Quotes
Times New Roman -- the most decisive of the fonts.
Jacob
Barbara: We can hardly get parents to come to the open house. I don't think you're going to get that many at drop off.
Janine: Oh, no, I'm very good at canvassing. People always open the door for me because they think I'm a lost child.
Janine: Who's with me?
Gregory: I'll do it with you after school, Janine!
Barbara: Oooh...
Gregory: I mean, I'll get engaged with you... with the parents... we're gonna get signatures!
Gregory: I really don't know where we go from here. We didn't get enough signatures and we need at least 500 to prove to the school board that the community is against going charter.
Ava: Hold up! All we need is signatures? That's easy. I know tons of names -- Barbara, Melissa, Jason, Marge, Homer, Peter Pan --
Gregory: Real names
Ava: So.. How'd that begging work out?
Janine: We're not begging, we are respectfully pleading... and not well. Where'd you go?
Ava: Job interview.
Janine: Ava!
Ava: I'll be the first one fired by Legendary. You know what they say, the finest one in, the first one out.
Janine: What if we just focus on new ideas because what we've been doing isn't working?
Ava: No idea is too stupid to pitch.
Allie: How about we just lock all the doors in the school? Then they can't get in. Like Lean on Me?
Ava: In a rare turn of events, I was wrong. Please only pitch good ideas.
Allie: We could bribe the superintendent!
Melissa: With what money? Would you get your head in the game, Allie!
Mr. Johnson: In my safety deposit box, I have three-fourths of what I think is a treasure map, now if we find the other quarter --
Janine: So what, we throw a big festival during Open House and make people sign the petition to get in?
Ava: Now that's absurd. But it does give me an idea. We should throw a big FUN festival during Open House and make everyone sign the petition to get in!
Janine: Why can't you ever give me credit for a good idea?
Ava: Stop making everything about you, Janine. AVA FEST is about the kids!
This is gonna be the best show in Philly since Dru Hill sold out the Wachovia Center in '03. They were like two hours late, but Sisqo did like thirty backflips
Ava
Every student is special. And you have to give them your best. And you hope they will carry it with them, but at the end of the day, they have to decide who they want to be. And this one? Decided to be a jackass.
Barbara
