They called you exotic. Which is just people talk for awesome. Which you are.

That's racist. Jingoist. Whatever.

Ouch my eyes. It's like being shot in the eyes by a glitter gun.

Archer: I got to blow up a train.
Lana: Thanks, Gomez.
Archer: Nice.

Lana: Please tell me that's a smoke grenade.
Archer: Okay. it's not though.

Malory: Have the porter bring me a cobb salad.
Lana: Before or after we capture the dangerous terrorist?
Malory: Before.

My great-grandfather was nuts for skating. That and the Klan.

Cheryl

Armed with what? Pamphlets about Canada's responsible gun control laws?

Thanks, Freddy Foreshadowing.

Can I just put what I assume is your rock collection on the stupid train?

Pam

Speaking of excellence, did you hear we met a tiger? Then he got murdered.

Calzado: Crocodiles on a three wheeler?
Archer: Right, how scary would that be?

Archer Season 3 Quotes

Archer: So excuse me for needing some time to grieve.
Rip: By tending bar and banging newly weds?
Archer: Apparently that's my grieving process.

Pam: What a hunk
Cheryl: Total sploosh.
Lana: Yeah, gotta give him a sploosh.
Gillette: And whatever my equivalent of sploosh. Which I guess is just sploosh. Only with semen.