Buffy the Vampire Slayer Quotes
Buffy: Will, I'm not wrong here. Ted has a problem with me. He acts like I'm in the way or something. And Mom's been totally different since he's around.
Willow: Different...like happy?
Buffy: Like Stepford.
Ted: So Buffy, I bet the boys are lined up around the block trying to get a date with you?
Buffy: Not really.
Willow: Oh, they are. But she's only interested in...
[Buffy elbows her]
Willow: Uh, her studies! Book cracker Buffy. It's kind of her nickname.
Kendra: You talk about slaying like it's a job. It's not. It's who you are.
Buffy: Did you get that from your handbook?
Kendra: From you.
Buffy: I guess it’s something I really can’t fight. I’m a freak.
Kendra: Not the only freak.
Buffy: Not anymore.
Buffy: Still, I woulda kicked your butt in the end, and ya know why? No imagination.
Kendra: Really? Ya think so?
Buffy: Oh, I know so. You're good, but power alone isn't enough. A good fighter needs to know how to improvise...to go with the flow. Seriously, don't get me wrong, you really do have potential.
Kendra: Potential? I could wipe the floor with you right now.
[They stare at each other]
Buffy: That would be anger you’re feeling.
Kendra: What?
Buffy: You feel it right? How the anger gives you fire. A Slayer needs that.
Cordelia: I can't believe that I'm stuck spending what will probably be my last few moments on earth here with you!
Xander: I hope these are my last moments. Three more seconds with you and I'm gonna...
Cordelia: “I'm gonna” what? Coward!
Xander: Moron!
Cordelia: I hate you!
Xander: I hate you!
[They kiss]
Xander: We so need to get out of here.
Cordelia: Uh huh. [She nods]
Kendra: I study because it’s required. The Slayer handbook insists on it.
Willow: There's a Slayer handbook?
Buffy: Wait. Handbook? What handbook? How come I don't have a handbook?
Willow: Is there a T-shirt, too? 'Cause that would be cool...
Giles: After meeting you Buffy, I realized the handbook would be of no use in your case.
Buffy: What do you mean it would be of no use in my case? What’s wrong with me case?!
Giles: Good Lord. You were dead, Buffy.
Buffy: I was only gone for a minute.
Giles: Clearly it doesn't matter how long you were gone. You were physically dead, thus causing the activation of the next Slayer.
Kendra: She died?
Buffy: Just a little.
Giles: She drowned. She was revived.
Willow: So there really are two of them?
Giles: It seems so.
Kendra: Who are you?
Buffy: Who am I? You attacked me. Who the hell are you?!
Kendra: I am Kendra...the vampire slayer.
Cordelia: I can’t even believe you. You drag me out of bed for a ride? What am I...mass transportation?
Xander: That's what a lot of the guys say, but it's just locker room talk. I wouldn't pay it any mind.
Cordelia: Oh great, now I’m your taxi and your punching bag.
Xander: I like to think of you as my “witless foil” but have it your way.
Buffy: This guy was hardcore, Giles. Angel was powerfreaked by that ring.
Giles: I’m afraid he was not overreacting. This ring is worn only by members of the Order of Taraka. It's a society of deadly assassins dating back to King Solomon.
Xander: And didn't they beat the Elks this year in the Sunnydale Adult Bowling League Championships?
Giles: Their credo is to sow discord and kill the unwary.
Xander: Bowling is a vicious game.
Giles: That’s enough Xander!
Buffy: Giles, you're in pace mode. What gives?
Rupert Giles: Umm... this vampire who escaped, did you see what he took?
Buffy: No, but I can take a guess and say it was something old.
Rupert Giles: You made no effort to find out what was taken?
Buffy: Have a cow, Giles. I just figured it was your everyday vamp hijinx.
Giles: Well, what if it wasn’t? This could be very serious. If you made an effort to be more thorough in your observation...
Buffy: Well, if you don’t like the way I’m doing my job then why don’t you find someone else?! Oh, that’s right...there can only be one. As long as I’m alive there is no one else. Well, there you go...I don’t have to be the Slayer. I could be dead.
Buffy: What’s up?
Angel: Nothing.
[She walks to the drawer and drops the toy pig on the bed]
Buffy: Well, you don’t have a “nothing face”...you have a “something face.” And you don’t have to whisper, Mom is in L.A. until Thursday. Art buy or something.
Angel: Then why did you come in through the window?
[She looks shocked]
Buffy: Habit.
