Favorite Community Quotes
Dean: Do you know who might have stolen a box of hair nets from the kitchen?
Abed: Someone with hair.
Dean: I'm gonna write that down.
Why do I have to put the VCR on 3, if Bones is on 5?
Chang
Tell me how to get this laid-back, or I'll kill your families!
Pierce
Britta: I still thing that man is going to evolve into woman, not a dragon monster with three legs.
Pierce: Three legs?
Love is a gamble always, but waiting won't change the dice. Either you roll them or you lose your turn
Shirley [to Annie]
Oh my god, Pierce is going to be the only person ever to drown in a parking lot... twice.
Troy
Neil: This sword was one of a kind. It was forged by my ancestors.
Pierce: I hump it.
Annie: How much effort am I worth?
Jeff: I'd break a light sweat.
It's Wednesday. Sometimes I eat in Jeff's car. Don't tell him.
Abed
Troy: According to our polls, the campus is almost evenly divided. Now keep in mind, the margin of error on this thing is about 98%.
Abed: Could be higher. We don't even know how to do margins of error. We talked to two people at a vending machine.
I can't believe Jeff attacked a table with a fire axe and is still only the second craziest person in the room.
Shirley
Well that answers my question. Jeff Winger is sexy even in a coffin.
Dean Pelton
