Joan: You're playing a video game?
Sherlock: Worse. I'm watching a video of a video game.

Don't worry. I'm not throwing away my shot.

Marcus [to Sherlock]

We need to prepare ourselves. [Michael] is going to be back.

Sherlock [to Joan]

I gotta say I'm used to being the one doing the calling. That way, I get there faster.

Marcus [to Joan]

You're clearly doing God's work.

Sherlock [to Lubbock]

It's like a horny Alexa.

Joan [about Skylar]

The thing you need to understand is this isn't about you. It's about the company you keep.

Baynes [to Marcus]

He's at least half a nutjob, maybe more.

Marcus [to Gregson]

Is he teleporting a chocolate bunny?

Joan [to Sherlock]

Right, because now you're Mr. Congeniality.

Joan [to Sherlock]

You won't like having me as an enemy.

Sherlock [to Baynes]

The killer was performing a ritual, the ritual of obfuscation.

Sherlock [to Marcus]

Elementary Quotes

Holmes: Why do you suppose you hate your job so much?
Watson: I don't hate my job.
Holmes: You have two alarm clocks. No one with two alarm clocks loves their job. Two alarm clocks mean it's a chore for you to get up in the morning.

Watson: How do you do it, guess things?
Sherlock: I observe and then I deduce.
Watson: How did you know I was a doctor, you said you could tell from my hands.
Sherlock: Hand, singular. It was soft no calluses.
Watson: How did you know my father had an affair?
Sherlock: Google. Not everything is deducible.