Elementary
Thursdays 10:00 PM on CBSElementary Quotes
Drew Bishop: My sister has a lot of ex-boyfriends. Which one is missing?
Sherlock: Sammy Olivetti. Tall. Tattoos. Phallus to make a Clydesdale blush.
My mother's ghost recently set a room on fire, so I've been doing most of my thinking elsewhere.
Sherlock [to Hawes]
Hawes: Holmes? Anything I can help with?
Sherlock: Not yet. But if an autopsy is in the offing, I should know soon enough.
Joan: [Sherlock] didn't come home last night, and he hasn't returned my calls.
Marcus: Maybe he met someone. Or, knowing him, someone, her two friends and a pet tiger.
Dr. Hawes: We've talked about this. You don't get to go on the ride until it's your turn.
Sherlock: When it's my turn, I won't really get the full experience.
Dr. Hawes: You want the full experience? Stay there. I'll get my scalpel.
Don't pretend you haven't seen her naked. Everyone has seen her naked. But I wouldn't lead with that if I introduce you to her.
Joan [to Marcus]
Imagine the indignity of being told my brain is normal.
Sherlock [to Joan]
Yes, let's talk about bees, instead of the execution you just made in Yonkers.
Sherlock
I always imagined you have a secret lair beneath a volcano for such an occasion.
Sherlock [on his father's being in danger]
It wasn't *one* thing, was it? It was *everything*. Your life's work.
Sherlock [on what his father did to attract assassins]
There is only one thing that can guarantee peace -- your head on a pike. Hypothetically speaking, of course.
Joshua Vikner
Zoya Hashemi: What else have you learned?
Morland Holmes: You're a murderous hag.
