Inara: How did I avoid that?
Mal: By being fast like a freak

I've known a dozen like you. Skipped off-home early. Minor graft jobs here and there. Spent some time in the lockdown, but less than you claim. Now you're, what, a petty thief with delusions of standing? Sad little king of a sad little hill.

River

He insulted you. I hit him. Seemed like the thing to do.

Mal

You mussed up Atherton's face, and that has endeared you to me somewhat.

Warrick Harrow

Warrick Harrow: I know him, and I think he's a psychotic lowlife.
Mal: And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community.

Here lies my beloved Zoe, my autumn flower, somewhat less attractive now that she's all corpsified and gross.

Wash

Wash: You are acting captain...you know what happens if you fall asleep now?
Zoe: Jayne slits my throat and takes over.

Kaylee: Is that him?
Mal: That's the buffet table.
Kaylee: Well, how can we be sure unless we question it?

Mal: You're supposed to make me look respectable.
Kaylee: Yes sir, Captain Tight-pants.

'Course, you couldn't buy an invite with a diamond the size of a testicle. I got my hands on a couple.

Badger

Badger: Won't deal with me direct. He's taken an irrational dislike.
Jayne: What happened, he see your face

Badger: Thought we might have a bit of a sit-down.
Mal: Prefer a bit of a "piss off."

Firefly Quotes

Mal: You're only going to scare him.
Jayne: Pain is scary.

Mal: I gotta know how close the Alliance is, exactly how much you told them before Wash scrambled your call. So I've given Jayne here the job of finding out.
Jayne: He was non-specific as to how.