Favorite Friends Quotes
Phoebe: A stripper at a bachelor party, that is so clich. Why don't you guys get a magician?
Chandler: Well, if the magician can open my beer with his butt cheeks, then all right.
Monica: You know what? What if we're friends who don't see other people?
Richard: You mean like exclusive friends?
Monica: Why not?! I mean this has been the most amazing week. Would it be so terrible? Even if we were friends who lived together. Or, maybe someday friends who stood up in front of their other friends, and vowed to be friends forever.
Richard: Wow. You know we're back where we were. Honey, I would love to do all that, but nothing's changed.
Monica: That's not true, you don't have a mustache.
Joey: Since when do you roller blade?
Phoebe: Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he like, you know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so, you know, we made a deal that's he's going to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
Ross: And what are you going to do for him?
Phoebe: I'm going to let him.
Joey: Are you just getting home? It's late.
Rachel: Yeah, I know. I had the best day, though. I got to sit in on a meeting with the reps from Calvin Klein, I told my boss I liked this new line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it . . . how was your day?
Joey: I discovered I'm able to count all of my teeth using just my tongue.
Joey: Amy just burned Jo's manuscript. I don't see how he could ever forgive her!
Ross: Uh, Jo's a girl, it's short for Josephine.
Joey: But Jo's got a crush on Laurie. Oh, you mean it's like a a girl-girl thing? Cause that's the one thing missing from The Shining!
Chandler: No actually Laurie's a boy.
Joey: No wonder Rachel had to read this so many times!
Ross: (About Rachel attending a lecture with Mark) Well, I'm sorry, but, ah, look if you're not working with him anymore, why do you have to still do stuff with him?
Rachel: Because, he's my friend.
Ross: Okay, but do you really need another friend? I mean...
Rachel: Okay, well if I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play with Mark?
Ross: Is that funny? Am I supposed to be laughing?
Ross: I don't know, you thought "See you Saturday" was funny.
Rachel: I've got some bad news.
Ross: What?
Rachel: I can get a quick bite to eat, but then I have to come back up here.
Ross: Come on sweetie! You've had to work late every night for the past two weeks, what is it this time?
Mark: Actually, it's kinda my fault. I, I quit today.
Ross: (To Rachel) But work comes first!
(About Leslie) When we were playing together, that was the best time I've had in, like, all my lives.
Phoebe
Chandler: I thought tonight was your big anniversary dinner.
Ross: Yeah, there's been a little change of plans. We're breaking up instead.
(On the phone at work) I have the invoice right in front of me, and it clearly states that we ordered the Riviera bikini in a variety of sizes and colors. What? What difference does it make what I'm wearing!?
Rachel
Phoebe: (Barging into the apartment) I need an atlas! I need an atlas!
Monica: Why, do you have a report due?
Monica: So what country is he from?
Phoebe: Kazhg ...kazt ... there's a "g" in there.
Monica: (Referring to the country's location) Where is that?
Phoebe: In your atlas!
