Friends Season 1 Quotes
(About her contractions) I love them! Each one's like a little party in my uterus!
Carol
I thought a gynecologist would have no trouble dating women.
Rachel
Monica: Is there something fundamentally unmarryable about me?
Chandler: (Scrambling) Uh...
Monica: Well?
Chandler: (Pulling an imaginary ripcord) Dear God, this parachute is a knapsack!
Monica: Joey, what are you gonna do when you have a baby?
Joey: I'm gonna be in the waiting room, handing out cigars!
Chandler: Yes, Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the '50s.
Carol: What does he look like?
Ross: (Studying him) Kind of like my Uncle Ed covered in Jello.
Phoebe: (About Ross and Susan arguing) There are babies coming into the world in this very building and your negative fighting noises are not the first thing they should hear!
Ross: Yeah, Susan.
Phoebe: Don't make me do this again, I do not like my voice like this!
Monica: (Seeing a woman with newborn twins) No fair! I don't even have one! How come they get two?
Chandler: You'll get one.
Monica: Oh yeah? When?
Chandler: All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us are married, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
Monica: Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Chandler: Oh, no, no. I just meant hypothetically.
Monica: Okay, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
Chandler: No, no, no.
Monica: What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
Chandler: Uh, uh.
Monica: Well?
Chandler: Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack!
(Chandler throws himself over the back of the chair he was sitting in, pretending he can't open his parachute.)
Phoebe: Susan, he looks just like you!
Susan: (Beaming) Thanks.
Rachel: Oh God, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these!
Chandler: I know. I still am one of these.
Monica: I want a baby.
Chandler: Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow.
Monica: Get up. Come on. Let's get some coffee.
Chandler: Oh, ok, because we never do that.
Ross: Look, Carol never threw me out of a room before you came along.
Susan: Yeah? Well, there are a lot of things Carol never did before I came along.
Phoebe: (Singing) They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch.
But soon they'll grow up and resent you so much.
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why.
You cry and you cry and you cry.
And you cry and you ...
(Ross gives her some money) Oh, thank you Ross.
Ross: Yeah, I'm paying you to stop.
Susan: Phoebe, what do you see?
Phoebe: Well Susan, I see what appears to be a dark vent. Yes, it is in fact a dark vent.
