Monica: I can't believe he has a new roommate. Who is this guy?
Ross: Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.
Rachel: It'll never last, he's just a rebound roommate.

Chandler: Well you know, we got to talking and, uh, he said he needed a place and I had a spare room.
Joey: Oh, now it's a spare room?
Chandler: Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.

Monica: But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
Joey: I did. I thought it'd be great. I figured I'd have, like, time alone with my thoughts, but, you know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.

Monica: Damn it, Ross, get your butt out of the bathroom!
Ross: Calm down, I'm blow drying.
Monica: Blow drying what? You have no hair.

Phoebe: (About the woman who sang "Smelly Cat") I mean this poor woman.
Ross: What woman?
Phoebe: The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have a video.
Rachel: Okay, Pheebs. But what about you?
Phoebe: Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she's so talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like the right look or something, you know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those animals at the pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, like some old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh, oh that song has so many levels.

Joey: Yeah. Uh, oh, the best part, come on. (Leads them to the bathroom) Huh?
Rachel: Hey, nice toilet.
Joey: No no no, behind it.
Ross: You have a phone in here?
Joey: That's right, I have a phone in here.
Monica: Joey, promise me something.
Joey: Yeah.
Monica: Never call me from that phone.

(Picks up the orange juice carton and discovers it's empty) Alright, that's it! He just comes in here, Mr. Johnny Neweggs, with his, his, his moving the mail and his, his "see ya, pals!"


Monica: Ross, I hated you when we were kids.
Ross: You hated me when we were kids?
Monica: Yes. I hated you. I mean I, I, loved you in a "you're my brother so I have to" kind of way, but basically, yeah, I hated your guts.

(About Baywatch) Well that's the brilliance of it. The pretty people... and the running.


Richard: Maybe we should just tell them.
Monica: Maybe we should just tell your parents first.
Richard: My parents are dead.
Monica: God, you are so lucky.

Chandler: Richard's going to the party too, huh?
Monica: He's my parents' best friend. He has to be there.
Joey: So, is today the day you gonna tell them about you two?
Monica: Yeah, for my Dad's birthday, I decided to give him a stroke.

Joey: I don't wanna leave you high and dry.
Chandler: Hey, I've never been lower or wetter.

Friends Season 2 Quotes

Rachel: Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
Monica: (To Julie) It's an expression.

Chandler: Joey's tailor... took advantage of me.
Ross: What?
Joey: No way, I've been going to the guy for twelve years.
Chandler: Oh come on, he said he was going to do my inseem, then he ran his hand up my leg and then there was definite...
Ross: What? (Chandler closes his eyes)
Chandler: Cupping.
Joey: That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over, then they go up the other side then they move it back, and then they do the rear. Ross, will you tell him. Isn't that how a tailor measures pants?
Ross: Yes, yes it is... in prison!