How 'bout "Blotto"? It's gritty, it's got street cred. Plus I can keep my monogrammed slippers.

URL: He's clean. Smells nice too.
Smitty: Better than me?
URL: Aw, yeah.

You know the secret of traditional robot cooking? Start with a good, high-quality oil... then eat it.

Joey: Now, this score ain't gonna be no cake walk in the tea park, alright? There may be some death killing.
Clamps: It's gonna be clamp this, clamp that. Bada-climp, bada-clamp!
Donbot: What d'you think, Blotto? You in?
Bender: It's funny: Until now I always wanted to be a gangster... so the answer's yes.

Joey: Ho! Ho! This guy's an ox! He's got oxon-like strength! Hey, he needs a nickname, right? Let's call him Clamps.
Clamps: Clamps? That's my name, you numbskull! Don't make me clamp you one!

Donbot: Nice job, Bender. You passed the test. You wanna join me, Clamps and Joey Mouse Pad at our, uh, social club tomorrow night?
Bender: Uh, I'd rather plan some felonies.
Donbot: Oh. Then we should meet at our Mafia crime headquarters.

Yo! There's our pigeon now. Let's shoot bullets out of our guns.


Donbot: We're heisting a shipment of Zuban cigars.
Bender: Zubans? Those are the finest cigars in the universe. I can stink up a hole maternity ward with one of those things.

Bender: I don't feel good. I'm genuinely sick.
Fry: But we're about to take off. We gotta eat our blast-off sundaes.
Bender: I can't move. Oh, I think I'm gonna output.
Fry: OK, you stay in bed. I'll eat yours.

Now, since we're committing crimes that may be against the law, I suggest you have an alibi.


Bender: That's some fine oil-ade, son. We could use a man like you in the Robot Mafia, which I'm sorta in.
Tinny Tim: You flatter me, kind goon. But I'm only programmed to sell oil-ade and write in cute backwards letters like on the sign here.

Smitty: Seen any suspicious activity?
URL: Nope. But check out today's Marmaduke. Solid!

Futurama Season 2 Episode 17 Quotes

Leela (seeing a blurry image that looks like Bender): I think it's Blotto, that gangster I saw when my patch fell off! (her vision clears to reveal the Professor) Professor?! Where were you at 10pm last night?
Farnsworth: Where am I now?

Bender: So they sent a helpless child to kill me? Well I'm not going out without a fight. (kicks Tim's crutch out from under him)
Tinny Tim: Fine kick, sir! But I'm actually here to deliver your cut from the cigar heist.
Bender: Oh, sweet legal tender! Kid, tell the Donbot I'm quitting organized crime. From now on I'll stick to the regular kind.